1. The hospital to prevent patients from escaping 1 wall wall. The mental patient patients still want to escape from the hospital. Yu Yehei tried to turn over the wall. This to the 30th wall. "Are you tired?" "Not tired." So the two continued to look out. Thisy to the 60th wall. "Are you tired?" "Not tired." So the two continued to turn out of the wall and turned to the 99th wall. "Are you tired?" "Tired!" "That's good, let's go back"
. The blind man and sister -in -law ride a motorcycle together. This turned around, and the mule suddenly found that there was a ditch on the road, and quickly shouted: "Ditch! Ditch!" , Ah ... " The result, the blind man and the sister -in -law even took the car into the ditch.
. The magical side effects At a medical seminar, a medical doctor announced that he had invented a magical new medicine. . Another doctor asked: "What diseases are it used for medical treatment?" "We have no medicine for medicine." another doctor asked: "Its magic is its magical place Where is it? " This doctor for a while and said," Its side effects will cause patients to lose short -term memory, so several patients pay me three to four medical expenses. " The doctors participating in the seminar stood up and applauded warmly.
. The taste is so good
a Hollywood director decided to give his mother a birthday gift. He heard that there was a bird The can speak 12 languages, and he could also sing 10 famous songs. Immediately decided to buy this bird to send to his mother, for which he spent $ 50,000 On the day of his mother's birthday, he called his mother "What do you think of this bird? Mom?" R n abduction: I quietly covered your eyes; heart disease: you are my eternal pain in my chest; The mouse came out to send off; mart to kill someone with a knife: It is a robber who is too poor to even knife; : The most glorious moment is smashed on Newton's head;
6. Never talk to the parrot
one evening, Cindy returned home after class, just like Cooking the same time to prepare for dinner. However, she found that the water sink drainage pipe of the kitchen seemed to be blocked, so she called William William, hoping that he could help repair it. William agreed, and he said he would go to Cindy's house tomorrow afternoon. Because during Cindy's working hours, Cindy told him: "I will put the key under the foot of the door, you will come in. I have a Akita dog, it is very good, you don’t have to worry. In addition, you don’t have to worry. In addition, you don’t have to worry. I also raised a parrot, which is a troublesome guy. When you come in, no matter what it tells you. Remember! Never talk to the parrot. "William listened to it, although it was full of doubts, but it was good. The next afternoon, William went to Cindy's home on time, entering the door to start repairing the kitchen sink. The dog is very good, there is no call or a fierce him. The parrot kept talking to him and yelled. At the beginning William remembered Cindy's instructions, but the parrot continued to yell. After a while William finally couldn't bear it, he yelled at the parrot: "Shutup! You big bird!" The parrot froze, and William thought his roar had some effects. Then, I only heard the parrot imitating Cindy's voice and said, "Doggy! Bite him!" Then he only heard a scream from the kitchen.
7. Mosquito competition
has three mosquitoes in showing off their flight skills, stinking for a long time, noisy face red ears, all divided by They decided to have a "show". Britable mosquitoes first saw that it flew towards a frog. When I turned around a few times, when I returned, I saw the frog's tongue fighting a living. He proudly said, "Tell you! In my hometown ，若没有这种本事，马上就会完蛋的！”rn 美国蚊子冷笑两声：“哼！雕虫小技，不足挂齿！”于是他飞向两只青蛙，在他们之间来回了几次， When I came back, the tongue of the two frogs formed a dead knot, and he said with a stinky manner: "Hum! In my hometown, you can survive like this!" My hometown, I haven't seen such a poor technology! " It British and American mosquitoes said unconvinced:" How capable you think you are?! " So Chinese mosquitoes flew towards a group of frogs In this way, when I came back, I saw that the frogs' tongue was together, and it became a "Chinese knot".
A Scottish went to London and wanted to visit an old friend by the way, but forgot his address, so he sent a telegram to his father: "Do you know the address of Toma? Received an urgent recovery: "Know. "The Three Gorges Blog
It three people went to New York for vacation. They booked a suite on the 45th floor of a high -rise hotel. One night, the elevator failed, and the waiter arranged for them to spend the night in the lobby. After the Three Gorges Blog , after discussing, they decided to walk back to the room, and agreed to talk about jokes, singing and telling stories in order to reduce the fatigue of boarding. On the 34th floor, everyone feels exhausted. "Okay, Peter, you talk about a humorous story Peed said," The story is not long, but it is very sad: Forgot to be in the hall. "
This jokes are funny. There should not be many characters. You also learn to check the dictionary. Go to Fo Luo . His wife is working in the field and prepares to meet in Florida. The man arrived in Florida and was stationed in the hotel and hurriedly sent an email to his wife. The website was wrong. As a result, the email was sent to a priest's wife. Her husband had just died the day before, and she was heartbroken. When she opened the wrong email, she screamed , Pull your legs, die.
The emails are written like this: Deal, I just came to report. N love your husband Barded, this is really hot. (Illinois is a state in eastern United States. Winter is cold. Florida is in the south of the United States. R Na Big E-Mail Mistake a deadly mail
an Illinois Man Left the Streets of Chicago for a Vacation in FLORIDA. Day. When he reacked his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.
unable to find the scrap, he had wril adDRESS, he did Type it in from memory., he missed one letter, and his not to ad to an elderly preachers wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead. r n at the sound, her family rush into the room and saw this note on the screen: r DEAREST WIFE,
just Got Checked in. Prepared for your arbital.
your loving husband. The first sentence I heard from the eggshell. The first sentence he heard was the mother's heartbreaking shout: "God! "At first I thought my appearance was like God, which surprised my mother to such a point, but when I saw my brothers and sisters squatting at the corner and vomiting, I felt that things were not as simple as I thought. When my father saw me, he chased his mother with anger and ran three streets, and shouted: "You say! Who is this child! "
M mother's love is great. Although the old lady saw that I had a clinical response such as vomiting, dizziness, diarrhea, etc., she still closed her eyes and brought me and my brothers and sisters to tears. Swimming by the river.
but others are not so friendly to me. Many people say that I must be the illegitimate child of Lake Nice, because my parents' honeymoon is spent at Lake Nice; It is said that when God created me, I must drink too much; others say that I must have been kissed by the pigs when I was still egg, but the pigs on the farm expressed a strong protest. It is better to be made into sausages. Later, the farmer found me. At the moment he saw me, he suffered from a strange disease, twitching, spitting his mouth, dull eyes, and murmuring for a long time. I said to myself: "I want to kill him to feed the dog, and I want to kill him to feed the dog. "After hearing the dogs on the farm, all the bite of his tongue.
The cannot stay on the farm. I decided to run away from home and hurt my self -esteem. One night, I secretly got out of the farm. I thought that my actions were unknown and unknowingly, but when the legs across the farm, I heard a shocking cheer behind me. Such unpopular?! My heart, wow, and cool, the tragedy and anger in my chest finally reached saturation. I shouted loudly to the sky: "Cangtian! Actually I am not ugly! "As soon as the words fell, the clouds were densely clouded in the sky, and a lightning cut through the sky to split three large characters on the ground:" You lie! " "Forget it, even the heavens despise me. I still find a place where there is no smoking.
It long, I don’t know how long I have gone. I came to a swamp. Someone laughed at me. As a result, a child's shouting disappointed me ...
Xiaoyan duck: "Yeah! Mother! I found the legendary dinosaurs! "
The mother duck mother:" Child, don't talk nonsense, dinosaurs have long been extinct, ah? " what is this? Intersection Although this creature grows very deforms, after careful observation, I concluded that he should be a duck. "
Callow duck:" But why did he look so ugly. "
This mother:" This is because he always picks eaters when he eats, so he looks like this. Children, if you do n’t eat green peppers in the future, it will become like this. "
Theye duck:" It's terrible, mother, I will never pick up anymore in the future. "
days! I like to eat green peppers, and I never pick up food! I want to justify, but they flew away, and the old female duck was murmured to himself when he left. Said: "I don't know if he is so ugly would be infected. "I completely lost my confidence to survive, and I wanted to find a rope hanging, but no rope was willing to let me hang it; I wanted to drink pesticides, but pesticide hid in the bottle and didn't want to flow into my mouth; Let the hunter kill me, but when they saw me, they cried and shouted and said, "Please spare us, kill you, we will fall down for a lifetime! " Ugly duckling (2) Arhlet: Lin Changzhi
The people still have good people in the world. In the evening, I was collected by a lonely old lady. There is also a son. Her son knocked on the bell in Notre Dame in Paris, the name is like Cassimado. The old lady is good to me, but the fat hens she raised and the big fat cat always discriminate against me. He From time to time, the two blinked in front of me. At first I thought their eyes were wrong, and later I knew that they were showing off my double eyelids to me! I ignored them, they asked me:
"Can you lay eggs? "
" Will you catch mice? " "
" Will you sing? "
" Do you meow meow? " "
I is a duck, and a male duck, how could it be? When they knew that I couldn't do anything," Ugly is not your fault, it is not your fault. But running out of scary is your wrong, and you have nothing to do, what else do you live? "
I has nothing to say, indeed I have nothing to do, but do you blame me? I have only been to the duck school in the past three times, but whenever I entered the classroom, the teacher announced that the teacher announced the announcement of the teacher. Holidays. I don't want to eat leisure and I don't want to be discriminated against by them, so I left the old lady's house and wanted to go to cosmetic surgery, but when I saw me, I changed my pig to kill pigs. Suicide, but I am a duck! Although I didn't have any ability, I would swim at all! There was no way, I had to go to the shore. At this time, the toads in the lake shed saliva, holding the chopsticks, holding the chopsticks. Calling towards the sky. What is going on? I look up, oh my god, a group of snow -white birds flew over from the sky. They were bright and soft and soft. It's jumping ballet, why?! Why? Why is the flat -mouth animal with feathers, but the appearance is so big! Who is they? By the way, isn't it called a toad want to eat swan meat? See it to see I dare to be sure of the covered with watery in this lake, they are the legendary swans! I vowed secretly that in this life, I must do more good deeds, accumulate yin, and make a beautiful swan in the next life.
from the day when I saw the swan, I had a firm belief in my heart. In order to be beautiful in the afterlife, I gave the old man a seat and helped the little crickets who lost my way to find my mother. Do it. After I did a lot of good things, everyone began to talk about me, praised me, and sent me a nickname to be a masked person. I know, if I do n’t have to be masked, I do n’t even have the right to do good deeds. There will be no.
The blink of an eye, winter is here, I still look around with a mask, and when I walk to the river, I only listen to one person to shout panicked: "It's not good, the children in the river have a lot ..." I took a closer look, ah?! There was a child fell into the ice cave!
"Don't be afraid! I am coming! "I shouted, flying into the ice cave, in order to show my ability, there was a side body in the air and turned over 360 degrees in the air. I rushed down my mask. As soon as the child in the water saw me, a "嗖" sounded out of the water, and quickly climbed up ashore and ran home. I did not expect that the water in the river was frozen and frozen in the river like frozen dumplings because of my appearance. I was frozen in the river.
Come here, open your eyes, ah! Spring is here! Ah? Several swans greeted me with a smile! No! There was a toad swimming at me! I quickly waved my wings a few wings Oh my god! I even flew up! Look at the reflection in the water, God! The water in the water turned out to be the shadow of the swan! Look at your feathers, oh! It turned out to be as white as snow! Is it true that I have become a swan? Isn't this dreaming! I bit my tongue, mother, it hurts! It's not a dream, I really have become a swan! Is my behavior moved to the sky? Anyway, I am now a swan now I'm a swan. ! You have to print a few boxes of business cards to send it to everyone!
Since then, my life has changed dramatically: Many people want to sign to me, many people ask me to take a photo with them, no matter how I go, no matter how I go to the end of Wherever there are some females cry and shout to send me a love letter ... Of course, it is a bit troublesome to become a swan, especially those toads, always want to take advantage of me. But, I still feel that handsome guys are good! I advise those friends who are not good -looking, as long as you do more good deeds, you will definitely become a handsome guy! I am a living example. When I am still a ugly duckling, I dream of it. Happy happiness! Cacket test Arhlet: Lin Changzhi
. Choose crazy. The thunder split ().
A. It's a thunder, it rains to collect clothes B. "You lie! "
C. Certificate of handling
. Those who want to eat swan meat are ().
A. Toad B. Ugly duckling C. Big fat cat
3. Ugly duckling finally turned into ().
A. Super Saiyan B. Salted Egg Superman C. White Swan N 2. Fill in it bored.
The heartbreaking lungs and lonely, lonely, and saliva
1. Look at the toad in this lake (), I dare to be sure, they are legendary Swan!
2. On the evening of the day, I was collected by an old lady ().
3. I got out of the egg shell One sentence is the shout of the mother ().
4. I heard the cheers from behind me.
. n 1. Ugly duckling is the illegitimate child of Lake Nice, so he is so ugly. Monkey rubber bands, do slingshots, hit your glass. "()
3. Ugly duckling later helped others, so everyone called him" Living Lei Feng ". ()
. I am in the river. ()
. Some people say that ugly ducklings are lucky ducks, because he is as famous as Donald Duck; some people say that ugly ducklings are unfortunate, because the childhood experience brings him physically and mentally. Great trauma. Which one do you agree with the above two claims? Why?
. The appearance of the ugly duckling in the text has never been described as a positive description, but I can feel that his appearance is ugly. Please extract a sentence that can reflect the ugly duckling and ugly appearance.
. The physical strength. Children eating ice cream and playing skyscrapers with my grandma are not helpful). Xiaohong Hood (1) Author: Lin Changzhi
... Bamboo boards are such a dozen, we do n’t praise other, just praise the clever and clever, super invincible and cute mini small -red -hat! This little red hat, but it ’s not ordinary, she is a thin filling ... (One warning!) Keke, there is no fold ...
is divided into eight heads. On this day, the little red hat drank eighteen bowls of penetrated bottle in Jingyanggang and put on a whistle. I have a mountain solemn ... (Second warning!) Ah! Ah! When she came to the hill, she met Wu Song, Wu Song said, "OH! Kitty! You go wrong! "So Xiaohong Hood went home to sleep ...
The next morning, Xiaohong Hood opened his eyes and heard his mother's voice. , Hurry up! "
" deceived! My ass is in the bed! "
" Okay! Get up! You came early in the morning, saying that she was sick, couldn't move, and let you give her meals at noon! "
" Ah? Can't go early in the morning? What about? "
" She went to fish. "
" God bless me without clue ... hey? " How do I feel drunk? Are you filled me while I fall asleep? "
" Dead girl, who has given you alcohol, is not a lot of chocolate last night! "
" By the way, mother, can I not wear that red hat today! It's too unjust, too rural people! "
" No! Seven your sisters are just red orange, green, green, blue, blue purple, and each person has a color hat, so that I and your dad can distinguish you. "
" Hum! Then why don't you and your dad bring your hat, let us distinguish it? "
" Smelly girl, you look for death! " Hurry up and brush your face, wash your teeth, eat, and practice a tractor ... "
In lunch, the little red hat is carrying the basket, which contains the mothers on the road to lunch for lunch. A small wooden forest, the little red hat likes to play in it most. The little dolphins, little hair, dinosaurs, and little monsters in the woods are her good friends. Every time she gives meals, she will give the rice to these little friends Share.
The red hat sang to the woods and came to the woods. The friends heard the singing and waited for her long ago.
Xiaohong Hood: "Wow! Wow! Little Mao people, do you miss me? "
" Little Mao Ren: "Think! "
" Little Red Hat: "Where do you think?" "
Xiaomao people:" Stomach! "
" Little monster: "Ritty talk, what are the delicious ones today! "
" Little Red Hat: "Hehe, the little monster is very anxious, I haven't seen it for a few days, and you blame a lot. The eyebrows are on the chin!" "
" Little Monster: "I'm dizzy!" That's a beard. idiot! " Xiaohong Hood (2)
The people grabbed the basket and turned up ...
" Oh! " "The little monster screamed." It hurts! "Everyone looked at it quickly. It turned out that there was a mouse clamped in the basket and clamped the little monster's paw tightly. There was a note next to the mouse clamp:" Whoever eats who eats unlucky! " "It is the word Xiaohong Hood's mother.
Is friends:" Your mother is insidious enough! " Fortunately, there is only one mouse clip, and take out the lunch box! "
The red hat took out the lunch box, everyone saw it, it's dumbfounded. The lunch box is a password lock ...
" Little Dinosaur: "Your mother is really better than a monster than a monster Strange, lunch boxes are allocated. "
Xiahong Hood:" Sorry, next time I will bring you a lot of delicious food. I still eat a bit in my pocket, do you want it? "
" Little monster: "Ah? Have you eaten? What is it? Take it! "
Is Little Red Hat:" Well, give you biscuits slag ... "
mades:" ... "
Xiahong Hood:" I want Go to give me a meal! Wait for me to play with you! "
" little monster: "Don't forget to bring some delicious from your uncle's house." "
" Little Red Hat: "Hmm! "
Xiaomao people:" By the way, Xiaohong Hood, I have forgotten to tell you. Recently, a large mammal is moved in the woods. It is very powerful, you must be careful! "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow! Large mammals! Intersection Is it awesome? I really want to see it! What is mammalian? Why not be careful? "
" Little Mao Ren: "Damn! Mammals are milk -eating animals! Be careful to eat you! "
Is Little Red Hat:" Hahahaha ... Little Mao Man is humorous, since it is a milk -eating animal, why should you eat me? " I am not milk! "
" Little Mao Ren: "People eat milk when they were young, they only eat when they grow up!" "
" Little Red Hat cried: "Woo ... I also eat milk when I was a kid ... I would eat people when I grew up?" Woo ... "
Xiaomao people:" Oh! It really hurts. Don't cry! You are a human, it is a big gray wolf. It's completely different. "Xiao Hong hat:" Don't lie to me, I'm going to deliver meals, goodbye! " "
At the same time, the big gray wolf that Little Mao Ren said has been hiding behind the tree and watching the little red hat.
… Where is this! It's terrible, there are so many weird things! I am a wolf with an artistic temperament. For a long time, I have been obsessed with the confusion and decadence of Fan Gao's paintings and the passion of Picasso's works ... However, I am an ordinary wolf and I want to eat meat. You see, these objects, what little hair, little monsters, little dinosaurs ... can you eat? When you look at it, you are disgusting, where you have appetite! I moved here, and I was almost crazy. At least come to let me eat a little bit more normal, oh ... but today, today there is a white and tender girl wearing a red hat! It must be delicious, and it must be very artistic cells to look at her dress. After eating, it must be helpful for my artistic accomplishment! Ah throat and throat! Eat her! "
The big gray wolf followed the little red hat out of the woods. The flowers on the roadside were beautiful, and the little red hat was picked. When she bent down and picked the flowers, the big gray wolf was on time, a very elegant movement Put the past ...
The little red hat suddenly turned back, and the big gray wolf opened his paws. n Big Gray Wolf: "..."
The red hat suddenly screamed: "Wow! Wow! A big cat! "
This Big Gray Wolf's back of the head of the wolf dripping a pile of sweat ..." Stupid! " Do you dare to call me a cat? Intersection Cats have such a long melon seed face! Besides, do cats have such an elegant temperament? "
" Little Red Hat asked curiously: "Then I would like to ask aunt, who are you?" "
This Big Gray Wolf is anxious:" Shit! " Aunt? You are not divided by men and women! I am male! I am a big gray wolf! "
The red hat is very excited:" Wow! " You are a man! very handsome! Be my boyfriend! How about it? How about it? "
The sweat of the head of the big gray wolf continues:" You forgot to take medicine today! " Can anyone find a big gray wolf as a boyfriend? " Xiaohong Hood (3) This: Lin Changzhi
Xiaohong Hood is very sad:" I lost love again ... you don't like me ... you are so cruel! "
Big Gray Wolf:" Don't say that, after all, the gap between the temperament between us is too large, there is no common language ... relying, what is messy! Don't talk to you anymore, watch me eat you! "Speaking of the past again.
Xiaohong Hood:" Wait a minute, Brother Big Gray Wolf, I know you are playing with me. Since you don't want to be my boyfriend, then I will go to the meal for me ... but before leaving, I want you to see the paintings I draw, I hope you can remember me. "
Big Gray Wolf:" Can you paint too? " It's really incredible, okay, let's take a look. "
The red hat takes out a small book from the pocket of the shirt, opened it to the big gray wolf to see:" You see, this is two birds with two heads; this is a cat with an elephant nose ... " … "
The big gray wolf can't stand it, he spit out" wow ":" Oh my God! This is also called painting! It is simply defiled by art! I can't do it anymore, there is no appetite at all. I'll go home quickly, it is too exciting to me! "The big gray wolf ran away.
The red hat was disappointed and continued to walk to the grandmother's house.
No, I'm hungry! Eating this child who does not understand art is always stronger than eating those hairy monsters. Yes, my belly is tight, go back to eat her ... hey? No, now she must be far away from the woods. There are many people on the road. What should I do if it is not easy to start? By the way, isn't she going to give me food? I went to her uncle's house first, ate her uncle, and then waited for her to come to the door! Haha, I am a genius ... but where is her uncle's family? By the way, call and ask. "
Clashed to 114.
" Hey! Where is the family? "
" No. 05 serves you, you are sick, give you a phone call, please record: 6446 ×××. "
" Damn! You are sick! I hate ... "
has no choice but to find a family one by one. In the evening, he finally found the little red hat. In order not to cause her doubts, he did not know where to choose from Come on a red hat and put on a little red hat, knocking open the door.
The big gray wolf squeezed his throat and said, "姥, 姥, I'll send you a meal. "
is obviously angry, and said," I thought you wouldn't come! " Let you give a lunch and come at night, want to starve to death! "
" Don't blame me! " It is mother's movement too slowly ... "
" Hey? Xiaohong Hood, I haven't seen it for a few days, you have become more and more interesting! The beard has grown, and his face has grown. There is an extraordinary artistic atmosphere exuding all over his body ... "
Big gray wolf:" Ah hahahaha! Comfortable, really comfortable! Old lady, you have your eyesight! But ... "Saying, I swallowed my puppet into my stomach!
姥:" Oh! Who turned the lights? ah? ah? There is still water on my stove! Little red hat, don't make trouble. "
It big gray wolf snickered, put on the clothes, drilled into the quilt, and waited for the little red hat to come to the door.
, Wait for the moon to wash your feet and sleep ... Little Red Hat is finally here!
The red hat opened the door and opened the door: "姥, 姥! Little red hat is coming! Give you a meal! "
Grandma Wolf:" Little Red Hat, I miss! " Why come so late! "
" Little Red Hat: "Just on the road, it was about to rain, so I helped the ant move! "
Prevy Wolf:" It's a good boy, come over and let me see you. " "
The red hat went to the bed. Suddenly, she called:" Wow! " Wow! You are so imposing, why are there so much hair on your face? So cool! I want to grow too, I want it too! "
Prevy Wolf:" Silly child, the Mao's Mao is long, I want you to think! " "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow! How does your voice become so magnetic? So penetrating? It seems that Daolang's voice! "
Grandma Wolf:" Cut! " How can grandma's voice look like a native? I want you to want to be this voice! "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow!怎么, why is your nails so sharp? "
Pread Wolf:" Think of what you think! " "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow!怎么, why is your face so long? " Xiaohong Hood (4) Authors: Lin Changzhi
Grandma Wolf:" Think of what you think. "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow!的, how can the water on the stove turn off? "
Prevy Wolf:" I want you to think ... Keke, don't care about it, let me kiss you first ... "The big gray wolf wants to take the little red hat while the little red hat is also eaten. "Hey? Little Red Hat, what are you doing? What do you touch? "
A little red hat:" 姥, today I met a very cute big cat in the woods, so I drew him down and show you ... "
Da Gray Wolf spit out the little red hat, and then fainted ...
Xiaohong Hood: "Wow! You are so fashionable, and you will mutate clones! This time, I have two uncle! "
姥 姥:" Little Red Hat, you see, you are naughty again. The little red hats in the woods and the friends who took things from the uncle to the little friends who had eaten them, and when they didn't wait for Xiaohong Hood, everyone came to Xiaohong Hood's uncle's house. When they came in, they saw the wolf grandma who dizzy on the ground. R. n Pholes to pick up the clothes of the wolf, everyone exclaimed, "Wow! Which strong man killed the number of big bad guys in the forest — the big gray wolf? "
This red hats looked at the big cat in the woods. It was strange. He asked:" He is a large mammal that Xiaomao people say to eat people -big gray wolves? " "
Xiaomao people:" Yes! "
The red hat for a long time, everyone thought she was scared and asked her:" Hey! " Little red hat, you are okay! "
It little red hat squeezed out for a long time, letting everyone fall to the ground:" Wow! " Big gray wolf! It's really gray! "
" Little monster: Hey? The big gray wolf seems to be panting! "
" Xiaomao people: "Everyone can't move while he can't move, kill him!" "
" Little Red Hat: "Don't, don't kill him. Can we play like this ... "
So everyone listened to the idea of the little red hat, cut the big gray wolf's belly, and put a lot of stones in it, and threw him into the woods. ... Since then, the woods have been safe. The little red hat family and my uncle and friends have lived a happy life.
After the big gray wolf woke up, I felt thirsty, so I went to find water to drink , I think, the stomach is dragged to the ground, and then I know that I have been placed in so many stones in my stomach ...
Big Gray Wolf: "Why, I always hurt me? It turned out to be so hard like a group of monsters who didn't understand art, and his life was bitter! I installed such a stone in my stomach, and I didn't press a zipper. I took it out ... I can only pull it out slowly ... so much, when will it be pulled? " p.s. Sure is hot double. Agree 0 | Comment
I can hold back 5 without laughing, counting you fiercely 1, five -dollar was abducted by the criminal gang, called 100 yuan banknote: "Hey! Your son is here, you don't want us to tear your tickets, you don't want to use it to use yourself to use yourself. Change him! " 100 yuan banknotes and thought about: " Tear it, tear you even 5 yuan! " n2, a person in the desert in the desert He was about to starve to death, and then he picked up the magic lamp. God lamp: "I can only realize your wish, let's say, I hurry up." : "I want his wife ..." Then disdain: "It's almost starving to death, and it's greedy for beauty! It's sad!" After that, it disappeared. people: "... cake."
3, the earthworm family is boring this day, the little earthworm cuts itself into two stages of badminton, earthworm mother thinks this The method is good, cut yourself into four sections of mahjong, The earthworm father thought about it, and cut himself into minced meat. The earthworm mother cried and said, "Why are you so stupid? Cut so broken will die!" The earthworm father said weakly, "... suddenly want to play football." r. n4. Panda man wants QJ Panda Woman, Panda Woman is struggling to resist and vowed to death. The panda man said angrily after the failure of the panda man: "We are almost extinct!"
5, turtle rabbit race ... Rabbit quickly ran to the front ... ...
. The turtle saw a snail climb very slowly and slowly ... Say to him: you come up, I will carry you ... Then ... the snail came up ... . After a while ..... The turtle saw another ant ... say to him: You too Let's come up ... So the ant also came up. St after the ant came up ... I saw the snail above ... I said to him: Hello Do you know what the snail is said? Snail says: You hurry up, this turtle is so fast .......
6, a pair of men and women are eating dinner that girl has always asked the boy: You love you not love me? The boy looked at the girl and continued to eat dinner at a glance . The girl was very angry and asked again: Do you love me? The boy finally said: Love The girl asked again: How do you prove? Suddenly the boy took 30 yuan from his pocket, and asked the girl: Are you ten yuan? The girl took ten yuan to the boys ... boys put forty yuan on the table for a while ... Ask the boy angry: Do you want to prove you love me! The boy said: I have proved it! Forty in front of you!
7. Snack streets In found a shop that sells egg tower E each looks very delicious and delicious, want to buy one Clerk: Will this be sold alone? T clerk: No, this is Japan.
8, one day, the family was caught fire, Ma and mother escaped, and only one son was still inside. M mother shouted outside the house: "Son ... why are you doing ..." The son replied: "I'm wearing socks ..." Mom also said, "What socks are you wearing a fire ..." . After five minutes, the son hadn't come out yet. ..... M mother shouted again, "Son, what are you doing? Come out ~ It's all the fire, staying in it ..." Take off your socks ... "
9. Some people go to the river to fish
Bread of bread ~ I have no fish hooks for a long time ~ The no way he has to change the earthworms ~ I still have no fish hook for a long time ~~ n "*-%#% What to eat! Go to buy it yourself !!!"
10, a German, French, and a Japanese to work in the mine. The boss is an American. He said to the Germans: You have a good physique and you are responsible for your work. The Frenchman: You say you are an engineer, and you are responsible for mining plans. and said to the Japanese: You are thin. You are responsible for SUPPLIES. Then they started to work every other week. In a few days later, the Germans and the French found that the Japanese were gone. After a long time, they decided to go back to work first. When the Germans started working, the Japanese suddenly jumped out and called: "Surprise!"
11, "I can't see things too far," the patient Said to ophthalmologists. "Please come with me," the doctor brought the patient outside, pointed at the sun in the sky, and asked, "What do you think of that?" "The sun." The patient replied. "How far do you want to see!"
12, one day the animals smelled a smelly smell in front of the Guangong Temple. The snake said: I will not put such a stinky fart so young, it must be a cow. The cow said: I eat grass and will not put such stinky farts. The pig said: People who fart will blush. Suddenly Guan Gong rushed out and said the pigs and said, "How many times have I said, my blush is natural.
13. Someone encountered God in one day ... This suddenly intended to give that person a wish ... .... Me what wishes do you have ... The people thought about it ... The heard that cats have 9 lives .... .. , please give me 9 lives ... God said ... your wishes realize ... One day, that person is boring ... It, I want to say that I will die ...... Anyway, there are 9 lives lying in On the rails ... The result, a train drove over ... The people were still dead ... Why are this? Because there are 10 sections of the carriage of the train ...
14, one day, the funeral home sent three people, which is strange that their smiles after their death are^_ ^...... The funeral home administrator asked Pol.ice very much: Why did the face after their death turned out to^_^? Pol.ice says: This ... say a long ... you see the man on the left ... he is with her wife to spend the spring night together ..... . At the moment of the most passion ... I couldn't stand it ... Hanging The administrator answered: Well ... I would like to die under the flowers ... . Doing ghosts is also romantic ... how did the one in the middle die? Pol.ice: The one in the middle ... he .... ... It is really a tragedy in the world ... he walked on the road ... suddenly hearing his head Cai ... The bonus is more than 700 million .. This when he laughed happily ... but was hit by the car that came on the face ... result ... result .. .... Hang ... The administrator replied: Well ... he really has no blessing to enjoy the second half of his life of Ronghua and rich ... What about this one? Pol.ice: ... This dead is a bit pitiful ... When he climbed up the tree, he was split to death by thunder . The administrator replied:. ..... This is a bit wrong, why would you laugh when he was split up to ... pol.ice said: Because he climbed up the tree and thought ... suddenly a lightning. ..... He thought ... someone took a picture of him ...
15, saying thousands of years ago, whether it is a male dog or a bitch, They were squatting when they urinated. until the Tang Dynasty that things have changed ... The Tang Taizong has heard it! His old man raised a pair of Beijing dogs. Once Tang Taizong went to Huashan to sacrifice the sky, and brought this pair ... When the sacrifice was halfway, the bitch suddenly was anxious, so he ran to a tree to solve it. R N When sacrificing the sky, this was a very disrespect, so it annoyed the Jade Emperor, The jade emperor ordered Lei Gong to fight a thunder, just hit the tree, the tree fell, and the bitch was killed. The male dog watched it. I am very scared in the future ... Since then, every time the male dog urinates under the trees, he will stretch out one foot and hold the tree hard,
>> 1. I miss it when I was a kid: Remember that the elementary school teacher scolded me: "I slap you out!" At that time, I wanted to laugh but dare not laugh. >> >> 2. When I was in junior high school, the teacher asked us to evaluate ourselves. I said: "Fan came to reach out." Zhangkou "Everyone laughed !!! >> 3. In junior high school, our math teacher's surname Jiang asked him a question at a time. Intersection The classmates are hilarious, and I am cold! >> 4. Sports class in junior high school. I was sick that day. I was a sports member. After letting everyone line up, I originally wanted to give the leave to a sports teacher. The response came here, after saying "I ask for a leave", everyone laughed, and some people said "bribe" "too rotten >>" It's not enough "the teacher is also very happy. It became a topic ,,, cold. Essence Essence >> 5. Director of the High School Political and Education Office criticized some boys who like to watch hair films at a full school report: "Don't be proud, instead of shame", laughed with a large >> 6. At the playground The teacher said: The male classmate stood on the left side of me, the female classmate stood on the right side of me, and the others remained motionless ...... As a result, he didn't move. >> 7. One day when the rain was raining outside, the teacher walked into the classroom with a rainwater face. I didn't know what was looking for in front of the table. What? >> 8. In junior high school, a mathematical teacher lectured on the way to change and drank loudly on the podium: Classmates pay attention, I want to be transformed! ......... >> 9. The classmate made a noise below, and the teacher said, "You stand for me to the wall! Intersection 10. The junior high school teacher likes to use it in it ... "My bottom radius is 20cm, and my height is 50cm, then I ..." Someone said, " . " >> 11. High school algebra teacher" "Speak for no sound!" >> 12. The bowl fell, the big scar of the sky >> 13. The blackboard is not wiped, and anger: "Who is sitting in the village today? Don't wipe the blackboard!" >> 14. In junior high school, he should wear school uniforms, but there are always people who do not wear school uniforms or only wear pants or only clothes .. Before the flag raised, the principal took a tone tape and said: "Some students do not wear clothes, some students do not wear pants, and some simply clothes and pants do not wear!" > 15. , The host came to the stage: Let's enjoy it below: Xinjiang singing and dancing, setting off your skull! Creepy! Intersection Intersection >> 16. Once I said that I would have a very wide road classmate when I went home: Be careful of the car to kill you. Yeah! >> 18. A student participated in the school's recitation competition for the first time. It was particularly nervous. The teacher encouraged for a long time, and his palms were sweating. It was finally her turn. As soon as the students gritted their teeth, they went to the center of the Taipu: "Teachers, classmates, the topic I recite is: red >> Ye Crazy (Feng) ..." >> 19. There are also students who see the students who have been ordered by the teacher to study composition. They are particularly envious. They always hope that the teacher can also let themselves read it. The opportunity came. "Mo, you can read your composition!" Student "" "" "" My Teacher ". Teacher, I am like >> Your mother ... ": ( >> 20. Once I watched Dou Wentao talk about the embarrassment when he was just a host, did not say that the opening was a curtain curtain ... The most thing for me to spray was that he said that he had hosted a party at a party at a time At that time, calmly went up and said affectionately, "Friends, have you ever seen the Yellow River? Do you know that it is our mother's river ~~" After introducing the Yellow River with affection, he said, "Please listen to the" Yangtze River below The song " >> 21. In the high school class, go to the physical examination in the class. A mm of the same class in the same class found that the blood pressure for himself was a male classmate in junior high school. I couldn't get up, and said to the boy when I was in a hurry: Or should I take off my pants? The boy's face was red, saying, "No need. 22. I went to McDonald's to buy a sweet bucket at a time. It was finally my turn. I couldn't wait to say, "Give me two drums!" I did not expect the waiter to say loudly to me; "Two drums, four dollars!" To a long -lasting girl came out of the bathhouse, I wanted to set it almost, and I took the sentence for a long time: "You take a bath, there are not many men in it?" >> 24. Once, he talked with the bedroom friends. He said that he would not win me. He scolded, "You are my grandfather's son!" The whole bedroom laughed after 1 second of quiet! > 25. Go to visit the factory and see a piece. In the pipeline, I blurted out: "What kind of goods are there in this abortion line?" >> 26. There was an wrong person on the road and slapped it. The man turned to eat me. I was nervous. Say: It's okay, I confessed the mistake ... >> 27. KTV once, singing, a mm shouted: "Double Jaylen" of the stick in the first week ...... >> 28. On the day of the driver's license for a certain king, the examiner was embarrassed and asked him to have a fire hydrant on the side of the road. , Do not allow parking! " >> 29. Once we talked about the advertisements in TV at night. At this time, some people said a soft word, saying that" the hair is no trace, the dandruff is more outstanding " !!!!! >> 30. The phone called obviously. As soon as I said, I asked, "Dad, where are you?" In the unit! " >> 31. My classmates argued with others, and when they hurriedly opened their mouths:" Who do you coax? Do you think I have grown up? " >> 32. When my grandfather was 6 years old, I died! >> 33. Go to the restaurant to eat noodles at a time. All three of us want to eat chaos. Looped to the boss: Our three big chaos! >> 34. One classmate and I argue with the problem, at the end of the wind, and shouted at the table in a hurry: "You are nonsense, I'm not stupid!" " >> 35. Eating a day .... rice, why haven't my lady come yet, hurry up
Joke is something that makes people laugh. I have some super funny! Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection I am very willing to answer your questions, I hope it will be helpful to you! Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection The first day of school, the teacher asked Xiaoming: "Xiaoming, 1 1 =?" Xiaoming said: "I don't know." The teacher said, "Then you go home and ask your family." Xiaoming asked his mother to ask his mother , Mom is quarreling with others, Xiao Ming asked: "Mom 1 1 =?" Mom said, "Wang Ba egg!" Xiaoming knew 1 1 = Wang Ba egg; Xiaoming asked his father again, Dad was drinking beer, Xiao Ming asked: "Dad 1 1 =?" Dad said, "Shuang!" Xiaoming knew 1 1 = cool again; Xiaoming asked Grandpa again, Grandpa was watching TV, Xiaoming asked: "Grandpa 1 1 =?" Grandpa said: "Boss Boss!" Xiao Ming knew 1 1 = gangster boss; Xiao Ming went to ask her sister again, and her sister was singing the national anthem: people who did not want to be slaves! Xiaoming knew 1 1 = people who did not want to be slaves when they got up; Xiao Ming went to ask her sister again, and her sister was singing children's rhymes: Little Rabbit obediently opened the door! Xiaoming knew 1 1 = Little Rabbit obediently opened the door. The next day, the teacher asked: "Xiaoming 1 1 =?" Xiao Ming said: "Wang Ba egg." "Pap" Teacher slapped Xiaoming, Xiaoming said, "cool." The teacher said inexplicably, "Who teaches you you Xiaoming said: "Boss boss." The teacher frightened and asked, "What are you doing?" Xiao Ming sang: People who are unwilling to be slaves. The teacher went out of Xiao Mingguan, and Xiaoming sang while knocking on the door: The little rabbit obediently opened the door. The teacher fainted I to the poster, I feel this cold and cold joke. I give two! It should be too classic!
1, female: wear it! Male: It's better not to wear it. women: wear a safe point. Male: Believe in my technology. women: Don't let you go if you don't wear it. Male: Don't wear it like a man. women: You are annoying! Will it die when wearing a helmet on a motorcycle?
2, A, B, C, Ding, which one is the coolest? ==> Ding (thong) has worked hard for most of his life, and finally bought a house in the suburbs of Beijing. The day I paid the money, I was crying with a trembling hand and pulled out my mobile phone to tell my family. Who boot screen shows: Hebei Mobile is welcome!
The answer: Hubei-Hubei-junior magician three levels 2009-10-21 23:18
In a day, you take a walk in the forest, r, Suddenly, a big bear appeared from behind you At this time, when you found it, run the leg and run
a was caught by the bear, and was eaten tragicly ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -It is not as fast as b running out of the forest, and the bear abandoned chase ---------------------------------------------------------- The bear ran fast, and it was thrown away at once ---------------------------------------------------------------------- n Answers: -Lobe Newcomer III 2009-10-21 23:22
The story of report haha and hee hee one day n is here. Knock to death haha Hee hee crying: Haha, haha, haha, you died
11
The lady, can I let me appreciate your underwear?
The answer: jay_h1218-Lieutenant Level 8 2009-10-22 11:10
The reports from the past .. Fart .. Guess what? The shell was collapsed? Wrong .. The answer is .. , I put a fart and of course go! Otherwise, I still shouted: Hey, everyone came to see, I put a fart!
The answer: Watermelon Stames-Book Tong Grade 2009-10-22 13:00
Reporting from the past, a glass and a coffee cup walk on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road A truck pressed the horn, but why was the glass broken and the coffee cup was not broken? rn ----------------------------rnrn因为咖啡杯有耳朵，玻璃杯没有耳朵(Handle)
The answer: 觊 觊 (-Intern level 2009-10-22 20:53
The person who listened was B a: Over the past, a long time ago, there was a bear. He was a polar bear. He was boring and super boring. One, then pulled another, then pulled another, then pulled one, and then pulled one, then pulled one, and then pulled another one, and then pulled it out. One, then pulled another, then pulled one, then pulled one, and then pulled one ..... b very speechless, a little impatient a : Do you think this story is cold? b: Not cold a: But the polar bear feels cold!
friends did you know why Panasonic is not Sony Qiang? Intersection Intersection
because of Panasonic (afraid of Sony)
The origin of the origin of cold jokes is such a story: the little penguin asked his grandma one day, "Grandma, grandma, am I, am I not? A penguin? "" Yeah, of course you are a penguin. "The little penguin asked Dad again," Dad, dad, am I a penguin? "" Yeah, you are a penguin, what's wrong? " But why do I feel so cold? "
This is a bit nonsense, a bit boring, and it is a bit nice, a bit of postmodernism. Modern people talked about the original jokes, and when they were annoying, they came up with these cold things.
Xiaobai is very similar to his brother, do you know why?
because: really like Dabai
2, a polar bear stays lonely on the ice, In a daze, I started to pull my own hair, one ... two ... three ... the last one was left, he suddenly yelled ...................................................................................................................................................................................... It's so cold! Intersection ……………………
3, there are personal like onions, crying when walking n4, a day of summer, two bananas walking on the road .
The banana walking in front suddenly feels hot. He said, so hot, I want to take off my clothes.
.
The banana behind the result fell.
5, there is a hiding cat club, the head of the group has not found. n6, What is the two fingers? What is it? Yes ~~ Hands shaking down, what? What is it? It is fallen! Hahaha, laughed at me
7, extending four fingers,
is it?
four,
This four fingers,
is it?
wonderful ~!
8 When a millionaire drove a luxurious extended "Lincoln" car passing through a village, he saw that two beggars on the road were eating grass, and millions of rich men immediately stopped the car.
"Why do you eat grass?"
"We really have no money ..." A beggar replied.
"Really, get in the car, go to my house."
"I still have a wife and two children in my house ..." A beggar muttered Essence
"Calling them 1 rich man pointed to another beggar." And you, call your family also. "
" I have a lot of people in my family, in addition to my wife, there are five children. "Another beggar said.
" It doesn't matter, it's all called, go to 1
. The two beggars and their families got on the car. Extend the car. On the way to exercise, a beggar's wife said gratefully: "Boss, you are so nice, you can invite home from poor people like us."
Millionaires replied: "Nothing, I just returned from abroad. No one has been looking at the house. The lawn in the yard may be more than one meter high. You can eat enough.
9. There was a bread walking on the street. He felt hungry. I ate myself
. I used a marshmallow to play for a long time. He said, "So tired, I think I am softened."
10, there was a lamb in the past. One day he went out to play, but he met the big gray wolf.
The big gray wolf said, "I want to eat you! Intersection Intersection "
The guess, what's wrong?
This Big Gray Wolf ate the lamb
11, there is no ditch and no cleavage," 。 This communication is difficult.
12, wolf, tiger, and lion who played games will be eliminated? Because: Taotaro (eliminated wolf)
13, when will Chen Shui -bian, Chen Shui -bian? Will you want to be unified? When buying instant noodles.
14, why is the silkworm baby rich? Because ... silkworms will cocoon (frugal)
15, which is history The character is the most poor? Su Wu, because: Suwu Mu Sheyang North Sea (being flat)
16, Xiaoming Xinxin's hair, the next day came to the school, the students saw his new hairstyle, smiled and laughed Dao: Xiaoming, your head shape seems to be a kite! Xiao Ming feels very wronged, and ran outside and crying.. Crying and crying ... he flew up ... 17, one day, three, three In order to avoid the chase of the big gray wolf, the piglets built three huts. The big gray wolf blows out the cottage, the wooden house, the brick house, and the three piglets to run desperately, but they are still chased by the big gray wolf. It's up. Three piglets said hopelessly, do you look at it. We gave up, what about you. At this time, the big gray wolf laughed and kept saliva and said:
Then tell me quickly Where is my little red hat?
18, stones and rice cakes fight, and kick the rice cake into the sea when I get angry ...
Telling a story. Life, but the boys need to take military service, so they made an oath with the girl, gave the girl a diamond ring, and promised to meet the girl today three years later. At that time, the ring was used as a wedding ring. In the past, girls have been waiting for boys, but they can't wait. She is too sad. She is desperate to throw the diamond ring into the sea and walk away in the country. The location, so it will always become a regret. The boy is sad ... After a few years, the boy went fishing and guess what he caught? It was very big. He made a turnaround for three weeks and a half -and -half of the air over time.
21. When I moved with my friend Li Susi, there was no TV at home, and the two were boring. . We pretend that there is a TV on the table, and then the two pretending to have a remote control in the hand, and we can change the table. This bastard constantly changes the platform. I said that he didn't listen, and then we hit it.
22. A egg goes to the teahouse to drink tea. As a result, it becomes a tea egg; a egg runs to the Songhuajiang swimming. As a result, it becomes a pine flower egg. It turned into Lu (braised) eggs; there was an egg without home, and it turned into a wild egg; a egg accidentally fell on the road, fell to the ground, and turned into a missile; there was an egg; there was an egg; there was an egg; I ran to the yard, and the result became At the atomic bomb; a egg ran to the Qinghai -Tibet Plateau, and the result became a hydrogen bomb; a egg was sick, and the result became a bad guy; a egg was married, and the result became a bastard; a egg ran to the river to swim in the river to swim in the river. The result became a nuclear bomb; a egg ran to the flowers, and the result became Huadan; there was an egg riding a horse and holding a knife. It turned out that he was a knife horse; The long one is ugly, and the result becomes a dinosaur egg; one egg is male. His wife adulter to other eggs outside. As a result, he turned into a bastard; N 23, in the past, a person was surnamed Cai, and everyone called him Xiao Cai.
The result ...
one day, he was taken away!
24, there was a bird in the past, n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n R N He passes a piece of corn field every day,
but unfortunate,
All corn has become popcorn !!!
In the birds fly over ...
thought it was snowing, so it was cold ...
25, Xiaoming: Have you ever seen the turtle shook your head?
Kangkang shakes his head) No
There is
, the idiot said no, the mental retardation does not speak
words ???
Kangkang: ........ .....
26, a reporter wants to visit 100 penguins to the Arctic.
We Penguin said: Eat. Sleep.
The reporter asked what was to fight? The penguin left without saying anything. The reporter wanted to say okay I won't talk about it. What is he visited the second penguin? What is the usual interest? The second penguin said: Eat. Sleeping. How can you fight? The reporter murmured psychologically. A penguin to the 99th penguin they usually eat. Sleep.
until the 100th penguin.
What is your interest?
The 100th penguin: eat. Sleep.
n The 100th penguin: Because I am
27, coffee cups and water cups cross the road. At this time, a grandfather shouted, "Be careful, now It's a red light ". But after a while, the coffee cup passed the road smoothly, but the water cup was bumped into the water by the truck. Why? Intersection
Key: Because the coffee cup has "ears", there is no ^^
28,
To the arrow? Mr. Kong Ming? "
Zhuge Liang:" Believe me. "
Lu Su:" But I still worry ... "
Zhuge Liang: "No need."
Lu Su: "But, don't you think the ship is getting hotter and hotter?"
A little hindrance ... Is there anything wrong? "
Lu Su:" Yeah, I am worried that the enemy shoots the rocket ... "
Zhuge Liang: ￣￣￣ Do you swim? I can't "
29, soldiers:" thirst ... thirst ... "
After a while! I used to go to this place, remember that there was a Merlin nearby, and I might be here for a while. "
N "
In half an hour -Cao Ren:" Lord! The expedition found a lot of water! "
Cao Cao:" Hahahaha, do you hear it? Finally, drink water. "
The soldiers:" Don't go ... must find plums ... "
30, Diao Chan:" …………… "
Dong Zhuo: "………………"
Lu Bu: "I just want to listen to you a true thing, which one do you love more!"
: "…………………"
Dong Zhuo: "…………………"
Lu Bu: "Answer me!"
Dong Zhuo: "It's really hard to decide. ￣￣￣￣ Both of them like"
Lu Bu: "Renren !!!" - - According to the exam, the first BL love killing case in Chinese history occurred in the late Eastern Han Dynasty ...
Which one do you like ... Why are silkworm babies rich? ==> Because it will Cocoon (frugal) 2. Why does the little white rabbit marry zebra? ==> Because the rabbit mother said that tattoo is not a good child 3. When can it be unified? ==> Buy instant noodles Time (uniform instant noodles) 4. What lines do monkeys do not like? ==> Parallel line (because there is no interchange u003Cbanana>) 5. Chocolate and tomato fight, why is chocolate win? ==> Because of Chocolate stick 6. What will happen to the shark? ==> It has become mung bean paste 7. What is it into the hospital after the match is burned? ==> cotton swab 8. How did Lin Daiyu die? ==> Step death (Falling in the sky, Lin Mei Sister) 9. A pig said, "Come on,", make a food? ==> Chocolate 10. Tudou stabs the buns to be fatal, what's it? ==> Turn into a bean paste (kill) Pack 11. What animals love to stick the wall? ==> Seal (newspaper) 12. Why do fox often wrestle? ==> Because the fox is cunning (foot slippery) 13.4 Personally playing mahjong in the room, why did Police take away 5 people ==> Because the people they hit "Mahjong" 14. When do you like to drink soda? ==> When you are alone, (When you are alone, you will want soda) 15. There is an egg to go to the teahouse to drink tea, how about it? ==> As a result, it turned into tea eggs 16. There is a male deer, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it Walking, getting faster and faster, how about the end? ==> It has become a highway 17. One day mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor, it flowed a lot of blood, how about it? == > Become red beans 18. Why wouldn't the aircraft fly so high to the stars? ==> Because the stars will flash . corn wants to pursue fashion, and the head is hot, how can the result? What about it? ==> Turn into popcorn . What mice are walking with two feet? ==> Mouse Mouse 21. What ducks walk with two feet? ==> All ducks They all walk with two feet (do you want to say that Donald Duck) 22. Miss's business is not good now, why? ==> avian influenza 3. What kind of person can’t be in? Personal stations? ==> People with oil cavity (the oil gun slipped) 24. Is the dumplings boys or girls? ==> Boys have foreskin because dumplings have foreskin 25. People wearing golden clothes = => A shock (gold) person 26. A bee is dingling on the calendar ==> Wind (Bee) and Ri Li (Calendar) 27. A bear came over ==> Preparation Come (there is bear) 28. The mobile phone cannot fall into the toilet ==> The machine must not lose (wet) 29. There are ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheep ring ==> (One sheep squatting wrong) 30. How to make the sparrow quiet? ==> Press it (the crow is silent) 31. What is the sword of the transparent sword? ==> n3. What do the chiefs of African food people eat? Answer: Eat people, what about the chiefs to be vegetarian? ==> Eat Plants 33. Why is there no dinosaur now? ==> Dinosaurs have been making movies r 34. Xiaobai is very similar to his brother, know it is What? ==> It really looks like Dabai 35. There is an egg running to swim in Songhuajiang. What is it? ==> It becomes Lu (halogen) 37. There is an egg without home, how about it? ==> It becomes a wild egg 38. There is an egg on the road. Be careful and fell on the ground, how about it? ==> It turned into a inverted (guide) bomb 39. There was an egg running into the flowers, how about it? ==> R n 40. There is an egg to swim in the Dead Sea, how about it? ==> It turned into a salted egg Superman 41. Xiaoming and Xiaohua went to the seaside to tell a joke. After the joke, they died. Why? ==> Because of the tsunami (laughs) 42. Why do n’t the man go out? ==> Because when you go out, you will change the door. => Tianji (Tianji) cannot be leaked 44. Why is there only one corner of the iceberg? ==> Because the other horn was broken by the Titani ? ==> Put a wing for it (hard to fly) 46. Who has no phone call? ==> Tiaoyi (Tianyi Seamless Phone) The knife is the most lethal. "Why? ==> Because it is a hammer 48. Why should Chang'e rush to the moon? ==> Houyi shot for nine days, even if he fairy, he can't stand it. Ah 49. Xiao Hei, Xiao Bai, Xiaohuang, Xiaohong Four people flying, who will faint the opportunity to vomit? ==> Little White Rabbit (spit) 50. There is a fat man from What is the result of jumping from the high -rise building? ==> It has become a dead fat man 51. Two people have fallen into the trap. The dead person is called a dead person, what is the name of the living? 52. Which one is the worst of rubber, tiger skin, lion skin? ==> Astroma (rubber difference) 53. What are you afraid of cloth and paper? ==> No (cloth) afraid of 10,000, only paper (paper paper ) Fear of 54. The guest who appeared below is the pride of our Chinese man, a singer, who guess it is? ==> Ancient giant chickens 55. Which song lyrics have " Li Yan "? ==> The moon represents my heart (how deep Li Yan, I love you) 56. Why does Harry Potter live in the light bulb? ==> Because Harry Potter is a wizard (tungsten wire ) 57. What Kirin is best to eat? ==> Ice cream 58. What Kirin runs the fastest? ==> Michelin 59 . The cause of constipation (hit a foreign star name) ==> Stallong (shit is too strong) 60. The river and the countryside, the river is rush? ==> The countryside is too urgent (the countryside is too anxious ( Why is it too urgent to fry) 61. A, B, C, D, Ding, Wu, Ji, Geng, Xin, which word is the coolest? ==> Ding (thongs) 62. There is a room In the room, the pigeons will be hidden there ==> I hide your song (pigeon) on the roof 63. What should I do at 12 pm? ==> Hold the feet of the Buddha, because I hold the Buddha's feet at the time of Lin (zero) 64.police, hooligan, soldier, that person is the thinner? ==> Rogue (Rogue Professor-Saberous) 65. There is an idiot to fly, remove the toilet on the plane and throw it out, guess Why? ==> Because he is an idiot 66. Aladdin has a few brothers? ==> Three (Araja, Ala Yi, Alabi) 67. A group of eunuchs are chatting, guess one Idioms ==> Nonsenent talk (non -chicken talk) 68. How much is one heart worth? ==> 100 million (one heart) 69. The sun, the moon, which is dumb? = => Stars (the stars in the sky do not speak-Lu Binghua) 69. What is the surname of the pencil? ==> Xiao, cut (Xiao) pencil 70. What color can the most imitate? Red (mill) imitation 71. Who will help you add food after eating? ==> Flying Dragon, because Feilong adds 72. A puppy traveled in the desert, but he died. How did you die? ==> He was stretched, because there was no electric pole rod urine in the desert . A puppy traveled in the desert and found the electric pole. > The point pole is affixed with "Do not urinate here" . A puppy traveled in the desert and found the telephone pole. There was nothing posted on it. The dog was queuing, and did not wait for In a puppy traveled in the desert, found a telephone pole, didn't post anything, and the queue was scheduled. A beautiful dog MM, he is embarrassed 73. Whoever plays the game will be eliminated by the wolf, tiger and lion who played games? Impathy? ==> Suwu Mu Sheyang North Sea (being flat) 75. Which character in history is the fastest? ==> Cao Cao 76. The car will fly, please guess a drink = => Car (CAR Fly) 77. There is a steamed bun before, and a meatballs have been eaten? How about it? ==> R n 78. Who given the water? ==> Aha ("Ah, give me a glass of forgetful water") 79. There is a white cat and a black cat, the white cat falls to the water to the water Go, the black cat rescued it, what did the white cat say to the black cat? ==> Meow 80. Xiaoming's grandfather brushed his teeth while singing, why? ==> Fake teeth 81. How many stars in the sky? ==> Babc (Starbucks Starbucks) 82.tw is part of China (hit a Chinese herbal medicine name) ==> Angelica 83. Jade The emperor sprayed (hitting a city name) ==> Tianjin 84. Why go to the south in autumn? ==> If you go too slowly 19 horns, why? ==> There is a rhino 86. Fat is a well -known diving athlete, but one day he stood on the springboard, but did not dare to jump down, why? ==? > Because there is no water below 87. A taxi drove normally on the road, but did not violate any traffic rules, but was stopped by a police. Why? ==> Police 88. What chicken does not have wings? ==> Field chicken 89. What to fight is neither spent and comfortable? ==> Sleep 90. The manufacturing date is the product of the same day as the product What? ==> Newspaper 91. What books do n’t buy in the bookstore? ==> Shrine Book 92. The best -selling book? ==> Female Secretary 93. Spider loves to fall in love with After the butterfly, the butterfly rejected it. Why? ==> My mother said that it was not a good person who mixed the Internet all day 94. Panda loves the deer deeply, but was rejected when expressing love, why? ==
1. The hospital to prevent patients from escaping 1 wall wall.
The mental patient patients still want to escape from the hospital. Yu Yehei tried to turn over the wall.
This to the 30th wall.
"Are you tired?"
"Not tired."
So the two continued to look out.
Thisy to the 60th wall.
"Are you tired?"
"Not tired."
So the two continued to turn out of the wall and turned to the 99th wall.
"Are you tired?"
"Tired!"
"That's good, let's go back"
.
The blind man and sister -in -law ride a motorcycle together.
This turned around, and the mule suddenly found that there was a ditch on the road, and quickly shouted: "Ditch! Ditch!"
, Ah ... "
The result, the blind man and the sister -in -law even took the car into the ditch.
. The magical side effects
At a medical seminar, a medical doctor announced that he had invented a magical new medicine.
. Another doctor asked: "What diseases are it used for medical treatment?"
"We have no medicine for medicine."
another doctor asked: "Its magic is its magical place Where is it? "
This doctor for a while and said," Its side effects will cause patients to lose short -term memory, so several patients pay me three to four medical expenses. "
The doctors participating in the seminar stood up and applauded warmly.
. The taste is so good
a Hollywood director decided to give his mother a birthday gift. He heard that there was a bird
The can speak 12 languages, and he could also sing 10 famous songs. Immediately decided to buy this bird to send
to his mother, for which he spent $ 50,000 On the day of his mother's birthday, he called his mother
"What do you think of this bird? Mom?"
R n
abduction: I quietly covered your eyes;
heart disease: you are my eternal pain in my chest; The mouse came out to send off;
mart to kill someone with a knife: It is a robber who is too poor to even knife; : The most glorious moment is smashed on Newton's head;
6. Never talk to the parrot
one evening, Cindy returned home after class, just like Cooking the same time to prepare for dinner. However, she found that the water sink drainage pipe of the kitchen seemed to be blocked, so she called William William, hoping that he could help repair it. William agreed, and he said he would go to Cindy's house tomorrow afternoon. Because during Cindy's working hours, Cindy told him: "I will put the key under the foot of the door, you will come in. I have a Akita dog, it is very good, you don’t have to worry. In addition, you don’t have to worry. In addition, you don’t have to worry. I also raised a parrot, which is a troublesome guy. When you come in, no matter what it tells you. Remember! Never talk to the parrot. "William listened to it, although it was full of doubts, but it was good.
The next afternoon, William went to Cindy's home on time, entering the door to start repairing the kitchen sink. The dog is very good, there is no call or a fierce him. The parrot kept talking to him and yelled. At the beginning William remembered Cindy's instructions, but the parrot continued to yell. After a while William finally couldn't bear it, he yelled at the parrot: "Shutup! You big bird!" The parrot froze, and William thought his roar had some effects. Then, I only heard the parrot imitating Cindy's voice and said, "Doggy! Bite him!" Then he only heard a scream from the kitchen.
7. Mosquito competition
has three mosquitoes in showing off their flight skills, stinking for a long time, noisy face red ears, all divided by
They decided to have a "show".
Britable mosquitoes first saw that it flew towards a frog. When I turned around a few times, when I returned, I saw the frog's tongue fighting a living. He proudly said, "Tell you! In my hometown ，若没有这种本事，马上就会完蛋的！”rn 美国蚊子冷笑两声：“哼！雕虫小技，不足挂齿！”于是他飞向两只青蛙，在他们之间来回了几次， When I came back, the tongue of the two frogs formed a dead knot, and he said with a stinky manner: "Hum! In my hometown, you can survive like this!" My hometown, I haven't seen such a poor technology! "
It British and American mosquitoes said unconvinced:" How capable you think you are?! "
So Chinese mosquitoes flew towards a group of frogs In this way, when I came back, I saw that the frogs' tongue was together, and it became a "Chinese knot".
A Scottish went to London and wanted to visit an old friend by the way, but forgot his address, so he sent a telegram to his father: "Do you know the address of Toma? Received an urgent recovery: "Know. "The Three Gorges Blog
It three people went to New York for vacation. They booked a suite on the 45th floor of a high -rise hotel.
One night, the elevator failed, and the waiter arranged for them to spend the night in the lobby. After the Three Gorges Blog
, after discussing, they decided to walk back to the room, and agreed to talk about jokes, singing and telling stories in order to reduce the fatigue of boarding. On the 34th floor, everyone feels exhausted.
"Okay, Peter, you talk about a humorous story
Peed said," The story is not long, but it is very sad: Forgot to be in the hall. "
This jokes are funny. There should not be many characters. You also learn to check the dictionary. Go to Fo Luo
. His wife is working in the field and prepares to meet in Florida. The man arrived in Florida and was stationed in the hotel and hurriedly sent an email to his wife. The website was wrong. As a result, the email was sent to a priest's wife. Her husband had just died the day before, and she was heartbroken. When she opened the wrong email, she screamed , Pull your legs, die.
The emails are written like this:
Deal,
I just came to report. N love your husband
Barded, this is really hot. (Illinois is a state in eastern United States. Winter is cold. Florida is in the south of the United States. R Na Big E-Mail Mistake a deadly mail
an Illinois Man Left the Streets of Chicago for a Vacation in FLORIDA. Day. When he reacked his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.
unable to find the scrap, he had wril adDRESS, he did Type it in from memory., he missed one letter, and his not to ad to an elderly preachers wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead. r n
at the sound, her family rush into the room and saw this note on the screen: r
DEAREST WIFE,
just Got Checked in. Prepared for your arbital.
your loving husband.
The first sentence I heard from the eggshell. The first sentence he heard was the mother's heartbreaking shout: "God! "At first I thought my appearance was like God, which surprised my mother to such a point, but when I saw my brothers and sisters squatting at the corner and vomiting, I felt that things were not as simple as I thought. When my father saw me, he chased his mother with anger and ran three streets, and shouted: "You say! Who is this child! "
M mother's love is great. Although the old lady saw that I had a clinical response such as vomiting, dizziness, diarrhea, etc., she still closed her eyes and brought me and my brothers and sisters to tears. Swimming by the river.
but others are not so friendly to me. Many people say that I must be the illegitimate child of Lake Nice, because my parents' honeymoon is spent at Lake Nice; It is said that when God created me, I must drink too much; others say that I must have been kissed by the pigs when I was still egg, but the pigs on the farm expressed a strong protest. It is better to be made into sausages. Later, the farmer found me. At the moment he saw me, he suffered from a strange disease, twitching, spitting his mouth, dull eyes, and murmuring for a long time. I said to myself: "I want to kill him to feed the dog, and I want to kill him to feed the dog. "After hearing the dogs on the farm, all the bite of his tongue.
The cannot stay on the farm. I decided to run away from home and hurt my self -esteem. One night, I secretly got out of the farm. I thought that my actions were unknown and unknowingly, but when the legs across the farm, I heard a shocking cheer behind me. Such unpopular?! My heart, wow, and cool, the tragedy and anger in my chest finally reached saturation. I shouted loudly to the sky: "Cangtian! Actually I am not ugly! "As soon as the words fell, the clouds were densely clouded in the sky, and a lightning cut through the sky to split three large characters on the ground:" You lie! " "Forget it, even the heavens despise me. I still find a place where there is no smoking.
It long, I don’t know how long I have gone. I came to a swamp. Someone laughed at me. As a result, a child's shouting disappointed me ...
Xiaoyan duck: "Yeah! Mother! I found the legendary dinosaurs! "
The mother duck mother:" Child, don't talk nonsense, dinosaurs have long been extinct, ah? " what is this? Intersection Although this creature grows very deforms, after careful observation, I concluded that he should be a duck. "
Callow duck:" But why did he look so ugly. "
This mother:" This is because he always picks eaters when he eats, so he looks like this. Children, if you do n’t eat green peppers in the future, it will become like this. "
Theye duck:" It's terrible, mother, I will never pick up anymore in the future. "
days! I like to eat green peppers, and I never pick up food! I want to justify, but they flew away, and the old female duck was murmured to himself when he left. Said: "I don't know if he is so ugly would be infected. "I completely lost my confidence to survive, and I wanted to find a rope hanging, but no rope was willing to let me hang it; I wanted to drink pesticides, but pesticide hid in the bottle and didn't want to flow into my mouth; Let the hunter kill me, but when they saw me, they cried and shouted and said, "Please spare us, kill you, we will fall down for a lifetime! "
Ugly duckling (2)
Arhlet: Lin Changzhi
The people still have good people in the world. In the evening, I was collected by a lonely old lady. There is also a son. Her son knocked on the bell in Notre Dame in Paris, the name is like Cassimado. The old lady is good to me, but the fat hens she raised and the big fat cat always discriminate against me. He From time to time, the two blinked in front of me. At first I thought their eyes were wrong, and later I knew that they were showing off my double eyelids to me! I ignored them, they asked me:
"Can you lay eggs? "
" Will you catch mice? " "
" Will you sing? "
" Do you meow meow? " "
I is a duck, and a male duck, how could it be? When they knew that I couldn't do anything," Ugly is not your fault, it is not your fault. But running out of scary is your wrong, and you have nothing to do, what else do you live? "
I has nothing to say, indeed I have nothing to do, but do you blame me? I have only been to the duck school in the past three times, but whenever I entered the classroom, the teacher announced that the teacher announced the announcement of the teacher. Holidays. I don't want to eat leisure and I don't want to be discriminated against by them, so I left the old lady's house and wanted to go to cosmetic surgery, but when I saw me, I changed my pig to kill pigs. Suicide, but I am a duck! Although I didn't have any ability, I would swim at all! There was no way, I had to go to the shore. At this time, the toads in the lake shed saliva, holding the chopsticks, holding the chopsticks. Calling towards the sky. What is going on? I look up, oh my god, a group of snow -white birds flew over from the sky. They were bright and soft and soft. It's jumping ballet, why?! Why? Why is the flat -mouth animal with feathers, but the appearance is so big! Who is they? By the way, isn't it called a toad want to eat swan meat? See it to see I dare to be sure of the covered with watery in this lake, they are the legendary swans! I vowed secretly that in this life, I must do more good deeds, accumulate yin, and make a beautiful swan in the next life.
from the day when I saw the swan, I had a firm belief in my heart. In order to be beautiful in the afterlife, I gave the old man a seat and helped the little crickets who lost my way to find my mother. Do it. After I did a lot of good things, everyone began to talk about me, praised me, and sent me a nickname to be a masked person. I know, if I do n’t have to be masked, I do n’t even have the right to do good deeds. There will be no.
The blink of an eye, winter is here, I still look around with a mask, and when I walk to the river, I only listen to one person to shout panicked: "It's not good, the children in the river have a lot ..." I took a closer look, ah?! There was a child fell into the ice cave!
"Don't be afraid! I am coming! "I shouted, flying into the ice cave, in order to show my ability, there was a side body in the air and turned over 360 degrees in the air. I rushed down my mask. As soon as the child in the water saw me, a "嗖" sounded out of the water, and quickly climbed up ashore and ran home. I did not expect that the water in the river was frozen and frozen in the river like frozen dumplings because of my appearance. I was frozen in the river.
Come here, open your eyes, ah! Spring is here! Ah? Several swans greeted me with a smile! No! There was a toad swimming at me! I quickly waved my wings a few wings Oh my god! I even flew up! Look at the reflection in the water, God! The water in the water turned out to be the shadow of the swan! Look at your feathers, oh! It turned out to be as white as snow! Is it true that I have become a swan? Isn't this dreaming! I bit my tongue, mother, it hurts! It's not a dream, I really have become a swan! Is my behavior moved to the sky? Anyway, I am now a swan now I'm a swan. ! You have to print a few boxes of business cards to send it to everyone!
Since then, my life has changed dramatically: Many people want to sign to me, many people ask me to take a photo with them, no matter how I go, no matter how I go to the end of Wherever there are some females cry and shout to send me a love letter ... Of course, it is a bit troublesome to become a swan, especially those toads, always want to take advantage of me. But, I still feel that handsome guys are good! I advise those friends who are not good -looking, as long as you do more good deeds, you will definitely become a handsome guy! I am a living example. When I am still a ugly duckling, I dream of it. Happy happiness!
Cacket test
Arhlet: Lin Changzhi
. Choose crazy. The thunder split ().
A. It's a thunder, it rains to collect clothes B. "You lie! "
C. Certificate of handling
. Those who want to eat swan meat are ().
A. Toad B. Ugly duckling C. Big fat cat
3. Ugly duckling finally turned into ().
A. Super Saiyan B. Salted Egg Superman C. White Swan
N 2. Fill in it bored.
The heartbreaking lungs and lonely, lonely, and saliva
1. Look at the toad in this lake (), I dare to be sure, they are legendary Swan!
2. On the evening of the day, I was collected by an old lady ().
3. I got out of the egg shell One sentence is the shout of the mother ().
4. I heard the cheers from behind me.
. n
1. Ugly duckling is the illegitimate child of Lake Nice, so he is so ugly. Monkey rubber bands, do slingshots, hit your glass. "()
3. Ugly duckling later helped others, so everyone called him" Living Lei Feng ". ()
. I am in the river. ()
. Some people say that ugly ducklings are lucky ducks, because he is as famous as Donald Duck; some people say that ugly ducklings are unfortunate, because the childhood experience brings him physically and mentally. Great trauma. Which one do you agree with the above two claims? Why?
. The appearance of the ugly duckling in the text has never been described as a positive description, but I can feel that his appearance is ugly. Please extract a sentence that can reflect the ugly duckling and ugly appearance.
. The physical strength. Children eating ice cream and playing skyscrapers with my grandma are not helpful).
Xiaohong Hood (1)
Author: Lin Changzhi
... Bamboo boards are such a dozen, we do n’t praise other, just praise the clever and clever, super invincible and cute mini small -red -hat! This little red hat, but it ’s not ordinary, she is a thin filling ... (One warning!) Keke, there is no fold ...
is divided into eight heads. On this day, the little red hat drank eighteen bowls of penetrated bottle in Jingyanggang and put on a whistle. I have a mountain solemn ... (Second warning!) Ah! Ah! When she came to the hill, she met Wu Song, Wu Song said, "OH! Kitty! You go wrong! "So Xiaohong Hood went home to sleep ...
The next morning, Xiaohong Hood opened his eyes and heard his mother's voice. , Hurry up! "
" deceived! My ass is in the bed! "
" Okay! Get up! You came early in the morning, saying that she was sick, couldn't move, and let you give her meals at noon! "
" Ah? Can't go early in the morning? What about? "
" She went to fish. "
" God bless me without clue ... hey? " How do I feel drunk? Are you filled me while I fall asleep? "
" Dead girl, who has given you alcohol, is not a lot of chocolate last night! "
" By the way, mother, can I not wear that red hat today! It's too unjust, too rural people! "
" No! Seven your sisters are just red orange, green, green, blue, blue purple, and each person has a color hat, so that I and your dad can distinguish you. "
" Hum! Then why don't you and your dad bring your hat, let us distinguish it? "
" Smelly girl, you look for death! " Hurry up and brush your face, wash your teeth, eat, and practice a tractor ... "
In lunch, the little red hat is carrying the basket, which contains the mothers on the road to lunch for lunch. A small wooden forest, the little red hat likes to play in it most. The little dolphins, little hair, dinosaurs, and little monsters in the woods are her good friends. Every time she gives meals, she will give the rice to these little friends Share.
The red hat sang to the woods and came to the woods. The friends heard the singing and waited for her long ago.
Xiaohong Hood: "Wow! Wow! Little Mao people, do you miss me? "
" Little Mao Ren: "Think! "
" Little Red Hat: "Where do you think?" "
Xiaomao people:" Stomach! "
" Little monster: "Ritty talk, what are the delicious ones today! "
" Little Red Hat: "Hehe, the little monster is very anxious, I haven't seen it for a few days, and you blame a lot. The eyebrows are on the chin!" "
" Little Monster: "I'm dizzy!" That's a beard. idiot! "
Xiaohong Hood (2)
The people grabbed the basket and turned up ...
" Oh! " "The little monster screamed." It hurts! "Everyone looked at it quickly. It turned out that there was a mouse clamped in the basket and clamped the little monster's paw tightly. There was a note next to the mouse clamp:" Whoever eats who eats unlucky! " "It is the word Xiaohong Hood's mother.
Is friends:" Your mother is insidious enough! " Fortunately, there is only one mouse clip, and take out the lunch box! "
The red hat took out the lunch box, everyone saw it, it's dumbfounded. The lunch box is a password lock ...
" Little Dinosaur: "Your mother is really better than a monster than a monster Strange, lunch boxes are allocated. "
Xiahong Hood:" Sorry, next time I will bring you a lot of delicious food. I still eat a bit in my pocket, do you want it? "
" Little monster: "Ah? Have you eaten? What is it? Take it! "
Is Little Red Hat:" Well, give you biscuits slag ... "
mades:" ... "
Xiahong Hood:" I want Go to give me a meal! Wait for me to play with you! "
" little monster: "Don't forget to bring some delicious from your uncle's house." "
" Little Red Hat: "Hmm! "
Xiaomao people:" By the way, Xiaohong Hood, I have forgotten to tell you. Recently, a large mammal is moved in the woods. It is very powerful, you must be careful! "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow! Large mammals! Intersection Is it awesome? I really want to see it! What is mammalian? Why not be careful? "
" Little Mao Ren: "Damn! Mammals are milk -eating animals! Be careful to eat you! "
Is Little Red Hat:" Hahahaha ... Little Mao Man is humorous, since it is a milk -eating animal, why should you eat me? " I am not milk! "
" Little Mao Ren: "People eat milk when they were young, they only eat when they grow up!" "
" Little Red Hat cried: "Woo ... I also eat milk when I was a kid ... I would eat people when I grew up?" Woo ... "
Xiaomao people:" Oh! It really hurts. Don't cry! You are a human, it is a big gray wolf. It's completely different. "Xiao Hong hat:" Don't lie to me, I'm going to deliver meals, goodbye! " "
At the same time, the big gray wolf that Little Mao Ren said has been hiding behind the tree and watching the little red hat.
… Where is this! It's terrible, there are so many weird things! I am a wolf with an artistic temperament. For a long time, I have been obsessed with the confusion and decadence of Fan Gao's paintings and the passion of Picasso's works ... However, I am an ordinary wolf and I want to eat meat. You see, these objects, what little hair, little monsters, little dinosaurs ... can you eat? When you look at it, you are disgusting, where you have appetite! I moved here, and I was almost crazy. At least come to let me eat a little bit more normal, oh ... but today, today there is a white and tender girl wearing a red hat! It must be delicious, and it must be very artistic cells to look at her dress. After eating, it must be helpful for my artistic accomplishment! Ah throat and throat! Eat her! "
The big gray wolf followed the little red hat out of the woods. The flowers on the roadside were beautiful, and the little red hat was picked. When she bent down and picked the flowers, the big gray wolf was on time, a very elegant movement Put the past ...
The little red hat suddenly turned back, and the big gray wolf opened his paws. n Big Gray Wolf: "..."
The red hat suddenly screamed: "Wow! Wow! A big cat! "
This Big Gray Wolf's back of the head of the wolf dripping a pile of sweat ..." Stupid! " Do you dare to call me a cat? Intersection Cats have such a long melon seed face! Besides, do cats have such an elegant temperament? "
" Little Red Hat asked curiously: "Then I would like to ask aunt, who are you?" "
This Big Gray Wolf is anxious:" Shit! " Aunt? You are not divided by men and women! I am male! I am a big gray wolf! "
The red hat is very excited:" Wow! " You are a man! very handsome! Be my boyfriend! How about it? How about it? "
The sweat of the head of the big gray wolf continues:" You forgot to take medicine today! " Can anyone find a big gray wolf as a boyfriend? "
Xiaohong Hood (3)
This: Lin Changzhi
Xiaohong Hood is very sad:" I lost love again ... you don't like me ... you are so cruel! "
Big Gray Wolf:" Don't say that, after all, the gap between the temperament between us is too large, there is no common language ... relying, what is messy! Don't talk to you anymore, watch me eat you! "Speaking of the past again.
Xiaohong Hood:" Wait a minute, Brother Big Gray Wolf, I know you are playing with me. Since you don't want to be my boyfriend, then I will go to the meal for me ... but before leaving, I want you to see the paintings I draw, I hope you can remember me. "
Big Gray Wolf:" Can you paint too? " It's really incredible, okay, let's take a look. "
The red hat takes out a small book from the pocket of the shirt, opened it to the big gray wolf to see:" You see, this is two birds with two heads; this is a cat with an elephant nose ... " … "
The big gray wolf can't stand it, he spit out" wow ":" Oh my God! This is also called painting! It is simply defiled by art! I can't do it anymore, there is no appetite at all. I'll go home quickly, it is too exciting to me! "The big gray wolf ran away.
The red hat was disappointed and continued to walk to the grandmother's house.
No, I'm hungry! Eating this child who does not understand art is always stronger than eating those hairy monsters. Yes, my belly is tight, go back to eat her ... hey? No, now she must be far away from the woods. There are many people on the road. What should I do if it is not easy to start? By the way, isn't she going to give me food? I went to her uncle's house first, ate her uncle, and then waited for her to come to the door! Haha, I am a genius ... but where is her uncle's family? By the way, call and ask. "
Clashed to 114.
" Hey! Where is the family? "
" No. 05 serves you, you are sick, give you a phone call, please record: 6446 ×××. "
" Damn! You are sick! I hate ... "
has no choice but to find a family one by one. In the evening, he finally found the little red hat. In order not to cause her doubts, he did not know where to choose from Come on a red hat and put on a little red hat, knocking open the door.
The big gray wolf squeezed his throat and said, "姥, 姥, I'll send you a meal. "
is obviously angry, and said," I thought you wouldn't come! " Let you give a lunch and come at night, want to starve to death! "
" Don't blame me! " It is mother's movement too slowly ... "
" Hey? Xiaohong Hood, I haven't seen it for a few days, you have become more and more interesting! The beard has grown, and his face has grown. There is an extraordinary artistic atmosphere exuding all over his body ... "
Big gray wolf:" Ah hahahaha! Comfortable, really comfortable! Old lady, you have your eyesight! But ... "Saying, I swallowed my puppet into my stomach!
姥:" Oh! Who turned the lights? ah? ah? There is still water on my stove! Little red hat, don't make trouble. "
It big gray wolf snickered, put on the clothes, drilled into the quilt, and waited for the little red hat to come to the door.
, Wait for the moon to wash your feet and sleep ... Little Red Hat is finally here!
The red hat opened the door and opened the door: "姥, 姥! Little red hat is coming! Give you a meal! "
Grandma Wolf:" Little Red Hat, I miss! " Why come so late! "
" Little Red Hat: "Just on the road, it was about to rain, so I helped the ant move! "
Prevy Wolf:" It's a good boy, come over and let me see you. " "
The red hat went to the bed. Suddenly, she called:" Wow! " Wow! You are so imposing, why are there so much hair on your face? So cool! I want to grow too, I want it too! "
Prevy Wolf:" Silly child, the Mao's Mao is long, I want you to think! " "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow! How does your voice become so magnetic? So penetrating? It seems that Daolang's voice! "
Grandma Wolf:" Cut! " How can grandma's voice look like a native? I want you to want to be this voice! "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow!怎么, why is your nails so sharp? "
Pread Wolf:" Think of what you think! " "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow!怎么, why is your face so long? "
Xiaohong Hood (4)
Authors: Lin Changzhi
Grandma Wolf:" Think of what you think. "
" Little Red Hat: "Wow!的, how can the water on the stove turn off? "
Prevy Wolf:" I want you to think ... Keke, don't care about it, let me kiss you first ... "The big gray wolf wants to take the little red hat while the little red hat is also eaten. "Hey? Little Red Hat, what are you doing? What do you touch? "
A little red hat:" 姥, today I met a very cute big cat in the woods, so I drew him down and show you ... "
Da Gray Wolf spit out the little red hat, and then fainted ...
Xiaohong Hood: "Wow! You are so fashionable, and you will mutate clones! This time, I have two uncle! "
姥 姥:" Little Red Hat, you see, you are naughty again. The little red hats in the woods and the friends who took things from the uncle to the little friends who had eaten them, and when they didn't wait for Xiaohong Hood, everyone came to Xiaohong Hood's uncle's house. When they came in, they saw the wolf grandma who dizzy on the ground. R. n
Pholes to pick up the clothes of the wolf, everyone exclaimed, "Wow! Which strong man killed the number of big bad guys in the forest — the big gray wolf? "
This red hats looked at the big cat in the woods. It was strange. He asked:" He is a large mammal that Xiaomao people say to eat people -big gray wolves? " "
Xiaomao people:" Yes! "
The red hat for a long time, everyone thought she was scared and asked her:" Hey! " Little red hat, you are okay! "
It little red hat squeezed out for a long time, letting everyone fall to the ground:" Wow! " Big gray wolf! It's really gray! "
" Little monster: Hey? The big gray wolf seems to be panting! "
" Xiaomao people: "Everyone can't move while he can't move, kill him!" "
" Little Red Hat: "Don't, don't kill him. Can we play like this ... "
So everyone listened to the idea of the little red hat, cut the big gray wolf's belly, and put a lot of stones in it, and threw him into the woods. ... Since then, the woods have been safe. The little red hat family and my uncle and friends have lived a happy life.
After the big gray wolf woke up, I felt thirsty, so I went to find water to drink , I think, the stomach is dragged to the ground, and then I know that I have been placed in so many stones in my stomach ...
Big Gray Wolf: "Why, I always hurt me? It turned out to be so hard like a group of monsters who didn't understand art, and his life was bitter! I installed such a stone in my stomach, and I didn't press a zipper. I took it out ... I can only pull it out slowly ... so much, when will it be pulled? "
p.s. Sure is hot double. Agree 0 | Comment
I can hold back 5 without laughing, counting you fiercely
1, five -dollar was abducted by the criminal gang, called 100 yuan banknote:
"Hey! Your son is here, you don't want us to tear your tickets, you don't want to use it to use yourself to use yourself. Change him! "
100 yuan banknotes and thought about:
" Tear it, tear you even 5 yuan! "
n2, a person in the desert in the desert He was about to starve to death, and then he picked up the magic lamp.
God lamp: "I can only realize your wish, let's say, I hurry up."
: "I want his wife ..."
Then disdain: "It's almost starving to death, and it's greedy for beauty! It's sad!" After that, it disappeared.
people: "... cake."
3, the earthworm family is boring this day, the little earthworm cuts itself into two stages of badminton,
earthworm mother thinks this The method is good, cut yourself into four sections of mahjong,
The earthworm father thought about it, and cut himself into minced meat.
The earthworm mother cried and said, "Why are you so stupid? Cut so broken will die!"
The earthworm father said weakly, "... suddenly want to play football."
r. n4. Panda man wants QJ Panda Woman, Panda Woman is struggling to resist and vowed to death.
The panda man said angrily after the failure of the panda man: "We are almost extinct!"
5, turtle rabbit race ... Rabbit quickly ran to the front ... ...
. The turtle saw a snail climb very slowly and slowly ... Say to him: you come up, I will carry you ...
Then ... the snail came up ...
. After a while ..... The turtle saw another ant ... say to him: You too Let's come up ...
So the ant also came up.
St after the ant came up ... I saw the snail above ... I said to him: Hello
Do you know what the snail is said?
Snail says: You hurry up, this turtle is so fast .......
6, a pair of men and women are eating dinner
that girl has always asked the boy: You love you not love me?
The boy looked at the girl and continued to eat dinner at a glance
. The girl was very angry and asked again: Do you love me?
The boy finally said: Love
The girl asked again: How do you prove?
Suddenly the boy took 30 yuan from his pocket,
and asked the girl: Are you ten yuan?
The girl took ten yuan to the boys ...
boys put forty yuan on the table
for a while ...
Ask the boy angry: Do you want to prove you love me!
The boy said: I have proved it! Forty in front of you!
7. Snack streets
In found a shop that sells egg tower
E each looks very delicious and delicious, want to buy one Clerk: Will this be sold alone?
T clerk: No, this is Japan.
8, one day, the family was caught fire,
Ma and mother escaped, and only one son was still inside.
M mother shouted outside the house:
"Son ... why are you doing ..." The son replied: "I'm wearing socks ..."
Mom also said, "What socks are you wearing a fire ..."
. After five minutes, the son hadn't come out yet. .....
M mother shouted again, "Son, what are you doing? Come out ~ It's all the fire, staying in it ..."
Take off your socks ... "
9. Some people go to the river to fish
Bread of bread ~ I have no fish hooks for a long time ~
The no way he has to change the earthworms ~ I still have no fish hook for a long time ~~
n "*-%#% What to eat! Go to buy it yourself !!!"
10, a German, French, and a Japanese to work in the mine.
The boss is an American. He said to the Germans: You have a good physique and you are responsible for your work.
The Frenchman: You say you are an engineer, and you are responsible for mining plans.
and said to the Japanese: You are thin. You are responsible for SUPPLIES.
Then they started to work every other week.
In a few days later, the Germans and the French found that the Japanese were gone. After a long time, they decided to go back to work first.
When the Germans started working, the Japanese suddenly jumped out and called:
"Surprise!"
11, "I can't see things too far," the patient Said to ophthalmologists.
"Please come with me," the doctor brought the patient outside, pointed at the sun in the sky, and asked, "What do you think of that?"
"The sun." The patient replied.
"How far do you want to see!"
12, one day the animals smelled a smelly smell in front of the Guangong Temple.
The snake said: I will not put such a stinky fart so young, it must be a cow.
The cow said: I eat grass and will not put such stinky farts.
The pig said: People who fart will blush.
Suddenly Guan Gong rushed out and said the pigs and said, "How many times have I said, my blush is natural.
13. Someone encountered God in one day ...
This suddenly intended to give that person a wish ...
....
Me what wishes do you have ...
The people thought about it ...
The heard that cats have 9 lives .... ..
, please give me 9 lives ...
God said ...
your wishes realize ...
One day, that person is boring ...
It, I want to say that I will die ......
Anyway, there are 9 lives
lying in On the rails ...
The result, a train drove over ...
The people were still dead ...
Why are this?
Because there are 10 sections of the carriage of the train ...
14, one day, the funeral home sent three people, which is strange that their smiles after their death are^_ ^......
The funeral home administrator asked Pol.ice very much: Why did the face after their death turned out to^_^?
Pol.ice says: This ... say a long ... you see the man on the left ... he is with her wife to spend the spring night together ..... . At the moment of the most passion ... I couldn't stand it ... Hanging
The administrator answered: Well ... I would like to die under the flowers ... . Doing ghosts is also romantic ... how did the one in the middle die?
Pol.ice: The one in the middle ... he .... ... It is really a tragedy in the world ... he walked on the road ... suddenly hearing his head Cai ... The bonus is more than 700 million ..
This when he laughed happily ... but was hit by the car that came on the face ... result ... result .. .... Hang ...
The administrator replied: Well ... he really has no blessing to enjoy the second half of his life of Ronghua and rich ... What about this one?
Pol.ice: ... This dead is a bit pitiful ... When he climbed up the tree, he was split to death by thunder
. The administrator replied:. ..... This is a bit wrong, why would you laugh when he was split up to ...
pol.ice said: Because he climbed up the tree and thought ... suddenly a lightning. .....
He thought ... someone took a picture of him ...
15, saying thousands of years ago, whether it is a male dog or a bitch, They were squatting when they urinated.
until the Tang Dynasty that things have changed ...
The Tang Taizong has heard it! His old man raised a pair of Beijing dogs. Once Tang Taizong went to Huashan to sacrifice the sky, and brought this pair ... When the sacrifice was halfway, the bitch suddenly was anxious, so he ran to a tree to solve it. R N When sacrificing the sky, this was a very disrespect, so it annoyed the Jade Emperor,
The jade emperor ordered Lei Gong to fight a thunder, just hit the tree, the tree fell, and the bitch was killed. The male dog watched it. I am very scared in the future ...
Since then, every time the male dog urinates under the trees, he will stretch out one foot and hold the tree hard,
>> 1. I miss it when I was a kid: Remember that the elementary school teacher scolded me: "I slap you out!" At that time, I wanted to laugh but dare not laugh.
>>
>> 2. When I was in junior high school, the teacher asked us to evaluate ourselves. I said: "Fan came to reach out." Zhangkou "Everyone laughed !!!
>> 3. In junior high school, our math teacher's surname Jiang asked him a question at a time. Intersection The classmates are hilarious, and I am cold!
>> 4. Sports class in junior high school. I was sick that day. I was a sports member. After letting everyone line up, I originally wanted to give the leave to a sports teacher. The response came here, after saying "I ask for a leave", everyone laughed, and some people said "bribe" "too rotten
>>" It's not enough "the teacher is also very happy. It became a topic ,,, cold. Essence Essence
>> 5. Director of the High School Political and Education Office criticized some boys who like to watch hair films at a full school report: "Don't be proud, instead of shame", laughed with a large
>> 6. At the playground The teacher said: The male classmate stood on the left side of me, the female classmate stood on the right side of me, and the others remained motionless ...... As a result, he didn't move.
>> 7. One day when the rain was raining outside, the teacher walked into the classroom with a rainwater face. I didn't know what was looking for in front of the table. What?
>> 8. In junior high school, a mathematical teacher lectured on the way to change and drank loudly on the podium: Classmates pay attention, I want to be transformed! .........
>> 9. The classmate made a noise below, and the teacher said, "You stand for me to the wall! Intersection 10. The junior high school teacher likes to use it in it ... "My bottom radius is 20cm, and my height is 50cm, then I ..." Someone said, " . "
>> 11. High school algebra teacher" "Speak for no sound!"
>> 12. The bowl fell, the big scar of the sky
>> 13. The blackboard is not wiped, and anger: "Who is sitting in the village today? Don't wipe the blackboard!"
>> 14. In junior high school, he should wear school uniforms, but there are always people who do not wear school uniforms or only wear pants or only clothes .. Before the flag raised, the principal took a tone tape and said: "Some students do not wear clothes, some students do not wear pants, and some simply clothes and pants do not wear!"
> 15. , The host came to the stage: Let's enjoy it below: Xinjiang singing and dancing, setting off your skull! Creepy! Intersection Intersection
>> 16. Once I said that I would have a very wide road classmate when I went home: Be careful of the car to kill you. Yeah!
>> 18. A student participated in the school's recitation competition for the first time. It was particularly nervous. The teacher encouraged for a long time, and his palms were sweating. It was finally her turn. As soon as the students gritted their teeth, they went to the center of the Taipu: "Teachers, classmates, the topic I recite is: red
>> Ye Crazy (Feng) ..."
>> 19. There are also students who see the students who have been ordered by the teacher to study composition. They are particularly envious. They always hope that the teacher can also let themselves read it. The opportunity came. "Mo, you can read your composition!" Student "" "" "" My Teacher ". Teacher, I am like
>> Your mother ... ": (
>> 20. Once I watched Dou Wentao talk about the embarrassment when he was just a host, did not say that the opening was a curtain curtain ... The most thing for me to spray was that he said that he had hosted a party at a party at a time At that time, calmly went up and said affectionately, "Friends, have you ever seen the Yellow River? Do you know that it is our mother's river ~~" After introducing the Yellow River with affection, he said, "Please listen to the" Yangtze River below The song "
>> 21. In the high school class, go to the physical examination in the class. A mm of the same class in the same class found that the blood pressure for himself was a male classmate in junior high school. I couldn't get up, and said to the boy when I was in a hurry: Or should I take off my pants? The boy's face was red, saying, "No need. 22. I went to McDonald's to buy a sweet bucket at a time. It was finally my turn. I couldn't wait to say, "Give me two drums!" I did not expect the waiter to say loudly to me; "Two drums, four dollars!" To a long -lasting girl came out of the bathhouse, I wanted to set it almost, and I took the sentence for a long time: "You take a bath, there are not many men in it?"
>> 24. Once, he talked with the bedroom friends. He said that he would not win me. He scolded, "You are my grandfather's son!" The whole bedroom laughed after 1 second of quiet!
> 25. Go to visit the factory and see a piece. In the pipeline, I blurted out: "What kind of goods are there in this abortion line?"
>> 26. There was an wrong person on the road and slapped it. The man turned to eat me. I was nervous. Say: It's okay, I confessed the mistake ...
>> 27. KTV once, singing, a mm shouted: "Double Jaylen" of the stick in the first week ......
>> 28. On the day of the driver's license for a certain king, the examiner was embarrassed and asked him to have a fire hydrant on the side of the road. , Do not allow parking! "
>> 29. Once we talked about the advertisements in TV at night. At this time, some people said a soft word, saying that" the hair is no trace, the dandruff is more outstanding " !!!!!
>> 30. The phone called obviously. As soon as I said, I asked, "Dad, where are you?" In the unit! "
>> 31. My classmates argued with others, and when they hurriedly opened their mouths:" Who do you coax? Do you think I have grown up? "
>> 32. When my grandfather was 6 years old, I died!
>> 33. Go to the restaurant to eat noodles at a time. All three of us want to eat chaos. Looped to the boss: Our three big chaos!
>> 34. One classmate and I argue with the problem, at the end of the wind, and shouted at the table in a hurry: "You are nonsense, I'm not stupid!" "
>> 35. Eating a day .... rice, why haven't my lady come yet, hurry up
Joke is something that makes people laugh. I have some
super funny! Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection I am very willing to answer your questions, I hope it will be helpful to you! Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection Intersection
The first day of school, the teacher asked Xiaoming: "Xiaoming, 1 1 =?" Xiaoming said: "I don't know." The teacher said, "Then you go home and ask your family." Xiaoming asked his mother to ask his mother , Mom is quarreling with others, Xiao Ming asked: "Mom 1 1 =?" Mom said, "Wang Ba egg!" Xiaoming knew 1 1 = Wang Ba egg; Xiaoming asked his father again, Dad was drinking beer, Xiao Ming asked: "Dad 1 1 =?" Dad said, "Shuang!" Xiaoming knew 1 1 = cool again; Xiaoming asked Grandpa again, Grandpa was watching TV, Xiaoming asked: "Grandpa 1 1 =?" Grandpa said: "Boss Boss!" Xiao Ming knew 1 1 = gangster boss; Xiao Ming went to ask her sister again, and her sister was singing the national anthem: people who did not want to be slaves! Xiaoming knew 1 1 = people who did not want to be slaves when they got up; Xiao Ming went to ask her sister again, and her sister was singing children's rhymes: Little Rabbit obediently opened the door! Xiaoming knew 1 1 = Little Rabbit obediently opened the door. The next day, the teacher asked: "Xiaoming 1 1 =?" Xiao Ming said: "Wang Ba egg." "Pap" Teacher slapped Xiaoming, Xiaoming said, "cool." The teacher said inexplicably, "Who teaches you you Xiaoming said: "Boss boss." The teacher frightened and asked, "What are you doing?" Xiao Ming sang: People who are unwilling to be slaves. The teacher went out of Xiao Mingguan, and Xiaoming sang while knocking on the door: The little rabbit obediently opened the door. The teacher fainted
I to the poster, I feel this cold and cold joke. I give two! It should be too classic!
1, female: wear it!
Male: It's better not to wear it.
women: wear a safe point.
Male: Believe in my technology.
women: Don't let you go if you don't wear it.
Male: Don't wear it like a man.
women: You are annoying! Will it die when wearing a helmet on a motorcycle?
2, A, B, C, Ding, which one is the coolest? ==> Ding (thong)
has worked hard for most of his life, and finally bought a house in the suburbs of Beijing.
The day I paid the money, I was crying with a trembling hand and pulled out my mobile phone to tell my family.
Who boot screen shows: Hebei Mobile is welcome!
The answer: Hubei-Hubei-junior magician three levels 2009-10-21 23:18
In a day, you take a walk in the forest, r,
Suddenly, a big bear appeared from behind you
At this time, when you found it, run the leg and run
a was caught by the bear, and was eaten tragicly ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -It is not as fast as
b running out of the forest, and the bear abandoned chase ---------------------------------------------------------- The bear ran fast, and it was thrown away at once ---------------------------------------------------------------------- n Answers: -Lobe Newcomer III 2009-10-21 23:22
The story of report haha and hee hee
one day
n is here. Knock to death haha
Hee hee crying: Haha, haha, haha, you died
11
The lady, can I let me appreciate your underwear?
The answer: jay_h1218-Lieutenant Level 8 2009-10-22 11:10
The reports from the past .. Fart .. Guess what?
The shell was collapsed? Wrong ..
The answer is ..
, I put a fart and of course go! Otherwise, I still shouted: Hey, everyone came to see, I put a fart!
The answer: Watermelon Stames-Book Tong Grade 2009-10-22 13:00
Reporting from the past, a glass and a coffee cup walk on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road, on the road A truck pressed the horn, but why was the glass broken and the coffee cup was not broken? rn ----------------------------rnrn因为咖啡杯有耳朵，玻璃杯没有耳朵(Handle)
The answer: 觊 觊 (-Intern level 2009-10-22 20:53
The person who listened was B
a: Over the past, a long time ago, there was a bear. He was a polar bear. He was boring and super boring. One, then pulled another, then pulled another, then pulled one, and then pulled one, then pulled one, and then pulled another one, and then pulled it out. One, then pulled another, then pulled one, then pulled one, and then pulled one .....
b very speechless, a little impatient
a : Do you think this story is cold?
b: Not cold
a: But the polar bear feels cold!
friends
did you know why Panasonic is not Sony Qiang? Intersection Intersection
because of Panasonic (afraid of Sony)
The origin of the origin of cold jokes is such a story: the little penguin asked his grandma one day, "Grandma, grandma, am I, am I not? A penguin? "" Yeah, of course you are a penguin. "The little penguin asked Dad again," Dad, dad, am I a penguin? "" Yeah, you are a penguin, what's wrong? " But why do I feel so cold? "
This is a bit nonsense, a bit boring, and it is a bit nice, a bit of postmodernism. Modern people talked about the original jokes, and when they were annoying, they came up with these cold things.
Xiaobai is very similar to his brother, do you know why?
because: really like Dabai
2, a polar bear stays lonely on the ice, In a daze, I started to pull my own hair, one ... two ... three ... the last one was left, he suddenly yelled ...................................................................................................................................................................................... It's so cold! Intersection ……………………
3, there are personal like onions, crying when walking
n4, a day of summer, two bananas walking on the road .
The banana walking in front suddenly feels hot. He said, so hot, I want to take off my clothes.
.
The banana behind the result fell.
5, there is a hiding cat club, the head of the group has not found.
n6, What is the two fingers? What is it? Yes ~~ Hands shaking down, what? What is it? It is fallen! Hahaha, laughed at me
7, extending four fingers,
is it?
four,
This four fingers,
is it?
wonderful ~!
8 When a millionaire drove a luxurious extended "Lincoln" car passing through a village, he saw that two beggars on the road were eating grass, and millions of rich men immediately stopped the car.
"Why do you eat grass?"
"We really have no money ..." A beggar replied.
"Really, get in the car, go to my house."
"I still have a wife and two children in my house ..." A beggar muttered Essence
"Calling them 1 rich man pointed to another beggar." And you, call your family also. "
" I have a lot of people in my family, in addition to my wife, there are five children. "Another beggar said.
" It doesn't matter, it's all called, go to 1
. The two beggars and their families got on the car. Extend the car. On the way to exercise, a beggar's wife said gratefully: "Boss, you are so nice, you can invite home from poor people like us."
Millionaires replied: "Nothing, I just returned from abroad. No one has been looking at the house. The lawn in the yard may be more than one meter high. You can eat enough.
9. There was a bread walking on the street. He felt hungry. I ate myself
. I used a marshmallow to play for a long time. He said, "So tired, I think I am softened."
10, there was a lamb in the past. One day he went out to play, but he met the big gray wolf.
The big gray wolf said, "I want to eat you! Intersection Intersection "
The guess, what's wrong?
This Big Gray Wolf ate the lamb
11, there is no ditch and no cleavage," 。 This communication is difficult.
12, wolf, tiger, and lion who played games will be eliminated? Because: Taotaro (eliminated wolf)
13, when will Chen Shui -bian, Chen Shui -bian? Will you want to be unified? When buying instant noodles.
14, why is the silkworm baby rich? Because ... silkworms will cocoon (frugal)
15, which is history The character is the most poor? Su Wu, because: Suwu Mu Sheyang North Sea (being flat)
16, Xiaoming Xinxin's hair, the next day came to the school, the students saw his new hairstyle, smiled and laughed Dao: Xiaoming, your head shape seems to be a kite! Xiao Ming feels very wronged, and ran outside and crying.. Crying and crying ... he flew up ...
17, one day, three, three In order to avoid the chase of the big gray wolf, the piglets built three huts. The big gray wolf blows out the cottage, the wooden house, the brick house, and the three piglets to run desperately, but they are still chased by the big gray wolf. It's up. Three piglets said hopelessly, do you look at it. We gave up, what about you. At this time, the big gray wolf laughed and kept saliva and said:
Then tell me quickly Where is my little red hat?
18, stones and rice cakes fight, and kick the rice cake into the sea when I get angry ...
Telling a story. Life, but the boys need to take military service, so they made an oath with the girl, gave the girl a diamond ring, and promised to meet the girl today three years later. At that time, the ring was used as a wedding ring. In the past, girls have been waiting for boys, but they can't wait. She is too sad. She is desperate to throw the diamond ring into the sea and walk away in the country. The location, so it will always become a regret. The boy is sad ... After a few years, the boy went fishing and guess what he caught? It was very big. He made a turnaround for three weeks and a half -and -half of the air over time.
21. When I moved with my friend Li Susi, there was no TV at home, and the two were boring. . We pretend that there is a TV on the table, and then the two pretending to have a remote control in the hand, and we can change the table. This bastard constantly changes the platform. I said that he didn't listen, and then we hit it.
22. A egg goes to the teahouse to drink tea. As a result, it becomes a tea egg; a egg runs to the Songhuajiang swimming. As a result, it becomes a pine flower egg. It turned into Lu (braised) eggs; there was an egg without home, and it turned into a wild egg; a egg accidentally fell on the road, fell to the ground, and turned into a missile; there was an egg; there was an egg; there was an egg; I ran to the yard, and the result became At the atomic bomb; a egg ran to the Qinghai -Tibet Plateau, and the result became a hydrogen bomb; a egg was sick, and the result became a bad guy; a egg was married, and the result became a bastard; a egg ran to the river to swim in the river to swim in the river. The result became a nuclear bomb; a egg ran to the flowers, and the result became Huadan; there was an egg riding a horse and holding a knife. It turned out that he was a knife horse; The long one is ugly, and the result becomes a dinosaur egg; one egg is male. His wife adulter to other eggs outside. As a result, he turned into a bastard; N
23, in the past, a person was surnamed Cai, and everyone called him Xiao Cai.
The result ...
one day, he was taken away!
24, there was a bird in the past,
n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n R N He passes a piece of corn field every day,
but unfortunate,
All corn has become popcorn !!!
In the birds fly over ...
thought it was snowing, so it was cold ...
25, Xiaoming: Have you ever seen the turtle shook your head?
Kangkang shakes his head) No
There is
, the idiot said no, the mental retardation does not speak
words ???
Kangkang: ........ .....
26, a reporter wants to visit 100 penguins to the Arctic.
We Penguin said: Eat. Sleep.
The reporter asked what was to fight? The penguin left without saying anything. The reporter wanted to say okay I won't talk about it. What is he visited the second penguin? What is the usual interest? The second penguin said: Eat. Sleeping. How can you fight? The reporter murmured psychologically. A penguin to the 99th penguin they usually eat. Sleep.
until the 100th penguin.
What is your interest?
The 100th penguin: eat. Sleep.
n
The 100th penguin: Because I am
27, coffee cups and water cups cross the road. At this time, a grandfather shouted, "Be careful, now It's a red light ". But after a while, the coffee cup passed the road smoothly, but the water cup was bumped into the water by the truck. Why? Intersection
Key: Because the coffee cup has "ears", there is no ^^
28,
To the arrow? Mr. Kong Ming? "
Zhuge Liang:" Believe me. "
Lu Su:" But I still worry ... "
Zhuge Liang: "No need."
Lu Su: "But, don't you think the ship is getting hotter and hotter?"
A little hindrance ... Is there anything wrong? "
Lu Su:" Yeah, I am worried that the enemy shoots the rocket ... "
Zhuge Liang: ￣￣￣ Do you swim? I can't "
29, soldiers:" thirst ... thirst ... "
After a while! I used to go to this place, remember that there was a Merlin nearby, and I might be here for a while. "
N "
In half an hour -Cao Ren:" Lord! The expedition found a lot of water! "
Cao Cao:" Hahahaha, do you hear it? Finally, drink water. "
The soldiers:" Don't go ... must find plums ... "
30, Diao Chan:" …………… "
Dong Zhuo: "………………"
Lu Bu: "I just want to listen to you a true thing, which one do you love more!"
: "…………………"
Dong Zhuo: "…………………"
Lu Bu: "Answer me!"
Dong Zhuo: "It's really hard to decide. ￣￣￣￣ Both of them like"
Lu Bu: "Renren !!!" - - According to the exam, the first BL love killing case in Chinese history occurred in the late Eastern Han Dynasty ...
Which one do you like ...
Why are silkworm babies rich? ==> Because it will Cocoon (frugal)
2. Why does the little white rabbit marry zebra? ==> Because the rabbit mother said that tattoo is not a good child
3. When can it be unified? ==> Buy instant noodles Time (uniform instant noodles)
4. What lines do monkeys do not like? ==> Parallel line (because there is no interchange u003Cbanana>)
5. Chocolate and tomato fight, why is chocolate win? ==> Because of Chocolate stick
6. What will happen to the shark? ==> It has become mung bean paste
7. What is it into the hospital after the match is burned? ==> cotton swab
8. How did Lin Daiyu die? ==> Step death (Falling in the sky, Lin Mei Sister)
9. A pig said, "Come on,", make a food? ==> Chocolate
10. Tudou stabs the buns to be fatal, what's it? ==> Turn into a bean paste (kill) Pack
11. What animals love to stick the wall? ==> Seal (newspaper)
12. Why do fox often wrestle? ==> Because the fox is cunning (foot slippery)
13.4 Personally playing mahjong in the room, why did Police take away 5 people ==> Because the people they hit "Mahjong"
14. When do you like to drink soda? ==> When you are alone, (When you are alone, you will want soda)
15. There is an egg to go to the teahouse to drink tea, how about it? ==> As a result, it turned into tea eggs
16. There is a male deer, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it Walking, getting faster and faster, how about the end? ==> It has become a highway
17. One day mung bean suicide jumped off the 5th floor, it flowed a lot of blood, how about it? == > Become red beans
18. Why wouldn't the aircraft fly so high to the stars? ==> Because the stars will flash
. corn wants to pursue fashion, and the head is hot, how can the result? What about it? ==> Turn into popcorn
. What mice are walking with two feet? ==> Mouse Mouse
21. What ducks walk with two feet? ==> All ducks They all walk with two feet (do you want to say that Donald Duck)
22. Miss's business is not good now, why? ==> avian influenza
3. What kind of person can’t be in? Personal stations? ==> People with oil cavity (the oil gun slipped)
24. Is the dumplings boys or girls? ==> Boys have foreskin because dumplings have foreskin
25. People wearing golden clothes = => A shock (gold) person
26. A bee is dingling on the calendar ==> Wind (Bee) and Ri Li (Calendar)
27. A bear came over ==> Preparation Come (there is bear)
28. The mobile phone cannot fall into the toilet ==> The machine must not lose (wet)
29. There are ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheep ring ==> (One sheep squatting wrong)
30. How to make the sparrow quiet? ==> Press it (the crow is silent)
31. What is the sword of the transparent sword? ==> n3. What do the chiefs of African food people eat? Answer: Eat people, what about the chiefs to be vegetarian? ==> Eat Plants
33. Why is there no dinosaur now? ==> Dinosaurs have been making movies r
34. Xiaobai is very similar to his brother, know it is What? ==> It really looks like Dabai
35. There is an egg running to swim in Songhuajiang. What is it? ==> It becomes Lu (halogen)
37. There is an egg without home, how about it? ==> It becomes a wild egg
38. There is an egg on the road. Be careful and fell on the ground, how about it? ==> It turned into a inverted (guide) bomb
39. There was an egg running into the flowers, how about it? ==> R n 40. There is an egg to swim in the Dead Sea, how about it? ==> It turned into a salted egg Superman
41. Xiaoming and Xiaohua went to the seaside to tell a joke. After the joke, they died. Why? ==> Because of the tsunami (laughs)
42. Why do n’t the man go out? ==> Because when you go out, you will change the door. => Tianji (Tianji) cannot be leaked
44. Why is there only one corner of the iceberg? ==> Because the other horn was broken by the Titani ? ==> Put a wing for it (hard to fly)
46. Who has no phone call? ==> Tiaoyi (Tianyi Seamless Phone)
The knife is the most lethal. "Why? ==> Because it is a hammer
48. Why should Chang'e rush to the moon? ==> Houyi shot for nine days, even if he fairy, he can't stand it. Ah
49. Xiao Hei, Xiao Bai, Xiaohuang, Xiaohong Four people flying, who will faint the opportunity to vomit? ==> Little White Rabbit (spit)
50. There is a fat man from What is the result of jumping from the high -rise building? ==> It has become a dead fat man
51. Two people have fallen into the trap. The dead person is called a dead person, what is the name of the living? 52. Which one is the worst of rubber, tiger skin, lion skin? ==> Astroma (rubber difference)
53. What are you afraid of cloth and paper? ==> No (cloth) afraid of 10,000, only paper (paper paper ) Fear of
54. The guest who appeared below is the pride of our Chinese man, a singer, who guess it is? ==> Ancient giant chickens
55. Which song lyrics have " Li Yan "? ==> The moon represents my heart (how deep Li Yan, I love you)
56. Why does Harry Potter live in the light bulb? ==> Because Harry Potter is a wizard (tungsten wire )
57. What Kirin is best to eat? ==> Ice cream
58. What Kirin runs the fastest? ==> Michelin
59 . The cause of constipation (hit a foreign star name) ==> Stallong (shit is too strong)
60. The river and the countryside, the river is rush? ==> The countryside is too urgent (the countryside is too anxious ( Why is it too urgent to fry)
61. A, B, C, D, Ding, Wu, Ji, Geng, Xin, which word is the coolest? ==> Ding (thongs)
62. There is a room In the room, the pigeons will be hidden there ==> I hide your song (pigeon) on the roof
63. What should I do at 12 pm? ==> Hold the feet of the Buddha, because I hold the Buddha's feet at the time of Lin (zero)
64.police, hooligan, soldier, that person is the thinner? ==> Rogue (Rogue Professor-Saberous)
65. There is an idiot to fly, remove the toilet on the plane and throw it out, guess Why? ==> Because he is an idiot
66. Aladdin has a few brothers? ==> Three (Araja, Ala Yi, Alabi)
67. A group of eunuchs are chatting, guess one Idioms ==> Nonsenent talk (non -chicken talk)
68. How much is one heart worth? ==> 100 million (one heart)
69. The sun, the moon, which is dumb? = => Stars (the stars in the sky do not speak-Lu Binghua)
69. What is the surname of the pencil? ==> Xiao, cut (Xiao) pencil
70. What color can the most imitate? Red (mill) imitation
71. Who will help you add food after eating? ==> Flying Dragon, because Feilong adds
72. A puppy traveled in the desert, but he died. How did you die? ==> He was stretched, because there was no electric pole rod urine in the desert
. A puppy traveled in the desert and found the electric pole. > The point pole is affixed with "Do not urinate here"
. A puppy traveled in the desert and found the telephone pole. There was nothing posted on it. The dog was queuing, and did not wait for
In a puppy traveled in the desert, found a telephone pole, didn't post anything, and the queue was scheduled. A beautiful dog MM, he is embarrassed
73. Whoever plays the game will be eliminated by the wolf, tiger and lion who played games? Impathy? ==> Suwu Mu Sheyang North Sea (being flat)
75. Which character in history is the fastest? ==> Cao Cao
76. The car will fly, please guess a drink = => Car (CAR Fly)
77. There is a steamed bun before, and a meatballs have been eaten? How about it? ==> R n 78. Who given the water? ==> Aha ("Ah, give me a glass of forgetful water")
79. There is a white cat and a black cat, the white cat falls to the water to the water Go, the black cat rescued it, what did the white cat say to the black cat? ==> Meow
80. Xiaoming's grandfather brushed his teeth while singing, why? ==> Fake teeth
81. How many stars in the sky? ==> Babc (Starbucks Starbucks)
82.tw is part of China (hit a Chinese herbal medicine name) ==> Angelica
83. Jade The emperor sprayed (hitting a city name) ==> Tianjin
84. Why go to the south in autumn? ==> If you go too slowly
19 horns, why? ==> There is a rhino
86. Fat is a well -known diving athlete, but one day he stood on the springboard, but did not dare to jump down, why? ==? > Because there is no water below
87. A taxi drove normally on the road, but did not violate any traffic rules, but was stopped by a police. Why? ==> Police 88. What chicken does not have wings? ==> Field chicken
89. What to fight is neither spent and comfortable? ==> Sleep
90. The manufacturing date is the product of the same day as the product What? ==> Newspaper
91. What books do n’t buy in the bookstore? ==> Shrine Book
92. The best -selling book? ==> Female Secretary
93. Spider loves to fall in love with After the butterfly, the butterfly rejected it. Why? ==> My mother said that it was not a good person who mixed the Internet all day
94. Panda loves the deer deeply, but was rejected when expressing love, why? ==